Captive Of Midnight's Hold
by BeyondxHatred
Summary: Life's not easy. Never has been, never will be. That's why some of us chose to give it up. Too bad the people around us tend to fight back. Which way would be better off? With or without him? ShinxKai. Also under construction. ADOPTED BY: CsillaDream.
1. Taunting the Moon

**Captive of Midnight's Hold**

**Started On:** 7/8/2008 03:32:32 PM

**Chapter 1:** Taunting the Moon (Edited)

**Edited:** 12/15/2009 5:33:05 PM

**Story Quote: **Pay attention to the ticking…the faint ticking… the maddeningly slow ticking…

**Author's Note: **Okay, due to the overpowering urge to fix this horrid story, I've gone and begun to edit. I don't know if it will get me back into writing for this story or not, but it should at least be _readable_ after I do this.

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**Onto the Story!!!**

* * *

Frigid winds billowed through the bustling people on the city streets below. Bright neon signs illuminated the dark night sky and low-hanging moon under which they shone. Towering buildings provided meager shelter against the biting chill the wind wrought. A steady current of pleasant songs were strung from the local shop clerks in eager hopes of drawing potential would-be shoppers. Unfortunately, those potential buyers merely shrugged them off and continued on in their hurry to nowhere.

The clerk's pleas went unheard.

A certain sign in particular, brandishing the words: Coffee Shop Courtyard, stood out. Within the swarming building a lone table with a sole occupant remain unnoticed in the far background. Amidst all the clatter in the room, this spot was deathly silent. No one dared approach it, and that was perfectly fine.

The occupier of the table stared out of the giant glass window with a bored expression. His head was laxly placed upon his open palm while his fingers drummed a tuneless beat upon the countertop. Deep indigo eyes remained hidden between a mop of mouse-brown hair. Muscles in his body ached with eagerness after being forced to remain in the same position for over an hour.

_Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick._

The methodical rhythm of his wristwatch echoed softly in his ears. It had been one hour, seven minutes, and thirty-two seconds since he had sat down. Thirty-three, thirty-four, thirty-five…

He just had to wait until that time. Not too much longer now. He just had to be patient.

The street that lay just beyond the glass was teeming with people. Some carried bags up past the elbow, no doubt full of presents and other goodies. Christmas wasn't too far away now. Other pedestrians tried to shield themselves from the elements by burrowing into their coats; making them appear as various skittish rodents in layers of cotton or leather. No, he needed to pay attention.

Pay attention to the ticking…the faint ticking… the maddeningly slow ticking…

The tension in his body forced him to move. He rolled his shoulders, shifted his stiff neck, and reached out his arm in order to see his watch. It was still only a quarter until nine. 9:40. He just had to make in until then. If only he could make time speed up. The hands of his watch rotated on their axis as he fiddled with the dial on the side. Oh, if only it was that easy.

Sighing, he reset the time and slouched back in his chair. How many nights had he been in this exact position? Anxiously waiting for the moment in which he could spread his wings and fly away from this place.

After all, no one could fly with as much grace and dignity through the night sky as he: The Legendary Phantom Thief.

Being a magician was a trait in which he highly admired about himself; a fact that he openly shared with anyone and everyone. He was always quick to the draw, however, the minute the mention of the Kaitou Kid was brought up. He loved his friends dearly, but the little secret of his nightly rendezvous with certain jewels and law enforcement would most likely ruin his relationship with them.

Especially Nakamori Aoko: the daughter of the man who despised him most. Nakamori Ginzo, though a determined man, never presented him with much of a challenge.

No, the only one had ever managed to accomplish such a feat. His sole adversary, his true friend and foe, his brother on the other side of the game board: Kudo Shinichi. Not only was the boy brilliant, much like himself, but he also bore a striking resemblance to him, as well. A small fact, Kaito grinned to himself, that he would never let the detective forget.

On many a heist he had taken the young man's appearance and stolen away into the crowd. He never mentioned that it required no more of a disguise than a comb and some gel to impersonate him, but he made sure to point out that it was in fact _he_ who stole identity right out from under him.

A smile played across his lips as he reminisced several occasions upon which he had mocked the detective right to his face.

"_By the number of times that I've used your face to escape, you must have girls throwing themselves at you, thinking it's me!"_

"_I bet they'd haul you off in a heartbeat if you ever decided to imitate __**me**__. Must be frustrating not to get retribution, am I right?"_

"_You know, you're not half bad at this game! Have you ever thought of taking up magic? Or acting? Both? I sure could use an stunt double, or an accomplice!"_

Such playful banters never evoked much of a response, but Kaito was sure he'd seen the fire in his opponent's eyes, that spark of resilience and willingness to partake in the game. His grin spread fully across his face. Just knowing that _he_ induced those emotions made his insides fluttery. A strange feeling it was, but the thrill of the chase always left him feeling giddy and jubilant; made his skin crawl.

He closed his eyes and sighed deeply, thinking of another moment in time in which he shared with Kudo. The memory rolled over him like a tide.

**

* * *

**

The loud chorus of pebbles echoed under the procession of his footsteps. The rooftop came to an abrupt halt, forcing KID to draw his escapade to a close. The silk of his white cape came ghosting around his frame, the moon creating a shimmering effect on his white attire. His rose his head to look into the pale face of the moon above.

Such a wonderful night for a heist.

In his right breast pocket he removed the motive of this night's excursions. I glittering green jewel. The _**Dragon's Treasure**__._

The moon's light pierced into the jewel's heart, casting a dazzling array of lights spread across the young thief's face. A single flash of pride lit KID's eyes before it was quickly replaced by utter disdain. Immediately, the jewel was brought back down to lie in the thief's open hand. What a waste; another heist worn out all for a dud quickly replaced the jewel to his pocket and redid his vest.

Enraged shouts could be heard ascending the stairwell. The police were slowly making their way to him. Huh, like they even had a _**chance**_. He smiled and reached into his coat. Nimble fingers groped for the small device supposedly hidden there, but instead they found nothing. Where was the switch to his glider? Panic made him go cold.

"Lose something, Kaitou-san?" a voice sneered behind him. KID turned away from his open jacket to stare at the owner of the voice. The stranger remained in shadow, but sight wasn't needed to identify him. Who else could catch up to him so quickly?

His carefully practiced poker face slid into place instantly. "Ah, I thought it was you, Tentei-kun. Not that I'm surprised." He took a cautious step towards the detective. Kudo stood rigidly still, making no attempt to further pursue the thief. No use anyways. Those policemen still noisily climbing the stairs would be upon them in mere minutes. Precious minutes. "I believe you have something I need," KID said, holding out his snowy-white glove to the other, expectantly.

Yeah, like it would be that easy.

A bright idea flashed into his mind.

"Alright, Kudo," KID said coyly, "how about a trade? The switch for the jewel?"

In all honesty, it was probably the worst possible ultimatum that he could have presented. So many flaws. Kudo knew that if he didn't give up the switch, the thief would be unable to escape into the sky; the police would easily be able to catch him. Also, KID would have given back the jewel anyways, even if he had his switch all along. Either way, the outcome would not end well for the Phantom.

That's why he was so shocked when Kudo raised his hand to reveal the switch on his open palm. What was he doing? He wasn't going to just let him fly away, was he? Was this a trick? No… this was a way for Kudo to keep the chase in motion, to let his friend escape just this once. Ah, but Nakamori-keibu would for sure have his hide for it.

KID let a genuine smile replace the mock one, a way of saying 'like I'd actually let you do it'.

Kudo's face fell in a brief moment of respite, confused at what KID could be up to. Then, a barrage of men burst through the skyline door. Guns were all pointed in the direction of the thief. This was new. Nakamori-keibu must have been desperate if he actually _**armed**_ his men, KID thought to himself idly. He had better think of an escape route fast. Losing his secret identity did not sound like a fun way to end the night. Maybe he should have taken Kudo's offer when he had the chance.

Nakamori Ginzo slowly revealed himself through his line of men.

"This ends tonight, KID!" he shouted unnecessarily through his megaphone. He couldn't have been more than twenty feet away, so why did he have to use it? But it was a good thing he did.

Several of the officers removed their hands from the triggers of their guns to instead cover their abused ears. He saw his chance and took it.

A flash grenade exploded at their feet and KID slid elegantly through the part in their line-up. Everyone began to cause a commotion. Punches were thrown, kicks were tossed, and several gunshots were fired. KID listened intently as he ran on, but no shouts of pain, so continued onto his target.

The light began to fade out…

… and weaken around the twin forms or KID and Kudo.

The silvery outline of the card gun was pressed threateningly against Kudo's temple and KID's thin arm wrapped snugly around the boy's neck. Kudo was deathly, blue eyes fixed steely at KID's monocle. The Phantom grimaced slightly. He didn't like that look one bit. Didn't Kudo know that he would never let any harm come to him? Never if he could help it. He would never let the game come to end at his hands.

But the detective knew that.

Nakamori-keibu was still trying to find KID with his partially flash-blind eyes. It only took the man a few second more to latch onto their mark. The current situation slowly dawned upon him and his face went grim. The thief had taken a hostage. His frown grew deeper. But why would KID do this? Didn't his policy state that nobody ever got hurt on his heists? Well, maybe that was his goal, but everyone turns into a different creature when they're backed up into a corner.

"Aha! The tables have turned, Nakamori-keibu," KID taunted. He smiled cheekily in that maniacal way that he knew the chief hated. Kudo squirmed lightly, making the thief draw him closer. Come on, Tantei-kun; let's not get feisty. A few of the officers closest to them took a couple steps back. "You did manage to put me on the spot, though, didn't you? I should congratulate you on accomplishing such a feat. Well, you and Tantei-kun, here." Kudo again tried to wriggle, though this time a little more persistently. KID used his strong arms to hold his still. Then, just faintly enough so that the others could not hear, he whispered, "Well, aren't you spirited? Come on, now. Be nice. I know you want me to escape as much as I do."

Kudo gave up his writhing instantaneously. Good boy.

"I want my switch back," KID announced loudly, this time addressing the chief. "In exchange, I'll give you back the boy and the jewel. Sound fair?"

Nakamori-keibu remained silent, his gaze transfixed on the two of them. He seemed confused about something. He looked from KID to Kudo and then back again. "Fine," he stated finally. "The boy and the jewel for your escape." A small sigh slipped past the thief's parted lips. Abruptly, Kudo went rigidly tense. His eyes looked panicked and… what was that there in his eyes? "Well?" Nakamori-keibu demanded. KID gave Kudo a final look before returning his attention to the man. He nodded solemnly.

Kudo slowly raised his hand and opened it, palm up, to KID, who took it greedily. Switch now in his possession, he no longer needed his 'hostage'. He stepped away and threw the gem into the detective's pocket. Kudo turned and gave the Phantom a strange look. Something was wrong with the boy, and KID didn't like it. Why was he acting like this? Well, now was not the time for these questions.

"Until next time, Nakamori-keibu." He tipped his hat and with on swift movement threw another flash bomb and took off into the sky.

In midair, KID turned and looked back at the increasingly shrinking scene. He could see the policemen slowly file their way back down the stairwell, the hoards of fans around the building, and there, just a spot on the roof, was the small dot that he knew to be Kudo. The dot remained motionless, watching the thief's departure. Wind licked at the sides of KID's face, drawing his attention back to the starry sky before him. His mind was still nagged by the constant slew of questions that lingered there. He wanted nothing more than to return and demand their answers, but he had to get home. Surely his mother would be worried by now. He couldn't say he was staying over at another friend's house. That would be the fourth time this week.

Those questions would just have to wait until his next heist…

* * *

Kaito's wide grin slowly faded as he slid back into the true reality he currently occupied. Suddenly alert, he looked around the coffee shop. Some of these people sure didn't look familiar, and where was the couple that had been sitting at the table beside him earlier? He must have been out of it for quite a while. He glanced at his watch. Oh, shit. Yeah, it'd been a while. He leapt up from his seat and made his way towards the door. Finally, he'd be able to get the answers he'd wanted for so long. He had to hurry. No way he was going to be late to this.

Kudo had just better be there.

* * *

**A/N:** Well, the first (edited) chapter is up now. So, if you read on and it gets progressively worse, I just haven't gotten to it yet. I will do my best to get to work on it, though. Keep an eye out!

**

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**

_**Ending Song Time!!!**_

_Confusion that never stops,_

_The closing walls and the ticking clocks,_

_Gonna come back and take you home,_

_I could not stop, that you now know,_

_Singing come out upon my seas,_

_Cursed missed opportunities,_

_Am I a part of the cure,_

_Or am I part of the disease?_

**Song: **Clocks **Artist:** Coldplay


	2. Abandoning the Moon

**Captive of Midnight's Hold**

**Started On: **07/10/08 01:17:51 AM

**Chapter Two:** Abandoning the Moon (Edited)

**Edited:** 09/20/10 4:12:39 PM

**Story Quote:** He knew KID's partner; he could track him.

**Author's Note:** Trying not to rant about how this story is trying to kill me...

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**Onto the Story!

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**

The glimmering stone pressed little indentations into the palm of his hand as he made his ascent up the marble staircase. The heels of his boots clicked loudly and echoed around him like a chorus of applause. He grinned to himself. This was his kind of stage, and his raging fans were right on his heels, just a flight or two below. The officers' shouts intermingled with the clacking of their boots, which added to the cacophony of applause around him. Kaitou's grin grew impossibly wider.

Right ahead was the metal door that led to the roof. This was just way too easy! He could hear the bellows from Nakamori-keibu not too far behind, which meant that the old detective must have really gotten fired up and was bounding up the stairs past his squad. He should know by now that singling himself out from the group never ended well, but let him do as he wished. It was more entertaining that way. And Kaitou needed a little more entertainment tonight. This was _way_ too easy!

But that was because he hadn't run into Kudo, yet.

Somewhere amidst all the excitement there was an underlining feeling of nervous anticipation. He hadn't had the chance to talk to his dear Tentei-kun since his last heist, and was dying to do so now. He was hoping that the detective would still surprise him. There was one last door to be opened before he became worried.

_And behind door number three is..._

Steeping through the door was like stepping through a veil. Cold air clawed at his skin and slowed his movements. All the heat in his body was screaming at him as he pressed on, begging him to return to the sanctuary inside. He shook the protests away and took a look around. The moon glowed with meek light; far too soft for the clearness of the sky. It set him on edge. He felt his strongest when the moon was bright. A silly superstition perhaps, but to him it made sense. He was an increment of the moon itself. When it was weak, so was he.

He was alone on the rooftop, was his next observation. His last hope dwindled as he circled, examining all the shadows the moon couldn't illuminate. Where could Kudo be? It wasn't like the detective to leave him alone on his heists. This was the exact scenario that Kaitou had feared. It was like the teen had fallen off the face of the earth! Over the weeks before this date, he'd been trying to get a hold of the elusive boy. He'd even gone so far as to follow him into his school. He discretely slipped a note into Kudo's book bag: a note that was never answered. He'd not been able to find him after that. The boy never returned home, and this had been Kaitou's last hope.

All he wanted was to be able to confront Kudo and-

Nakamori was finally making the final turn up the stairs to the door. He knew he should make his escape now, but the urge to flee was gone. He wanted answers, and he wanted them now. He'd figure out a way to escape later. The game was put to a screeching halt. This was all business.

Standing beside the open door, the thief waited for the screaming man to run past, and then slammed the door shut. He busted the handle, and simultaneously jammed the edges with his metal cards. That should slow down the rest of the precession enough for him to get what he wanted.

He turned and faced the inspector.

Ginzo Nakamori was actually quite startled when he heard the door slam behind him. He'd not seen the thief take off, but that didn't mean that he'd not escaped in a different manner. What reasons could he have to stay? He turned around gracelessly, arms far out at his sides, waiting for the chance to be able to do something. Anything. But he was rooted to the spot when KID decided to step out from the shadows. The white of his costume seemed repressed and spectral by the lack of moon's glow, which aided the eerie effect of his dead stare.

Seriousness didn't fit him.

Loud grunts and yells came from his officers behind the metal door, and it would only be a matter of time before they had it broken down. Both of them knew this. Time to get what needed to be said, said. There wouldn't be time for beating around the bush.

"What is it, KID?" he said, schooling his face into a neutral position. Kaitou'd changed the rules of the game, and he needed a moment to figure out how. What happened now would affect how the rest of the night acted out. He had to play his cards right or things could get seriously out of control.

The other stared for a moment longer, before the corners of his mouth were pulled back, baring his white teeth. It was a shabby mockery of his normal irritating smile. It did nothing to make Nakamori's suspicions ease. It actually made them quite worse. The fake smile was far more unsettling than the blank stare.

"Just a simple question, Nakamori-keibu. Nothing more. I won't keep you any longer than that, for I fear your entourage wouldn't be too kindly towards me." His voice was strained. Pent up emotions were trying to reign, and he was doing his best to keep them in check. What could possibly have gotten under his skin this way?

Oh, of course.

The inspector made the connection. Over the past week, he'd been asking the same question he was sure was burning on the thief's lips now. A question that had been haunting everyone who'd been on his case, and for everyone who was personally involved, even people who just followed the news feeds. But he didn't say anything aloud; instead letting KID ask for him.

He asked in a solid tone, "Where might Kudo Shinichi be?"

* * *

_Police Headquarters (Approximately Two Weeks Prior)_

Tensed fingers attempted to assuage the beginnings of a headache by working the veins in his temples. His desk was a slew of miscellaneous papers and beige folders. His mug of cold coffee teetered on the lone corner of the hidden desk it would fit.

The words on the pages danced before his strained eyes, taunting him, and aggravating him to no end. For hours he'd been pouring over every KID report he could get his hands on. Was there some sort of unspoken rule that said 'all reports must be as dry as dust'? He would be seeing these letters every time he closed his eyes. Despite the fact of imminent sleep, he was actually starting to worry that these words would haunt him in his dreams.

Something had been nagging at the back of his mind ever since KID's last great escape. More than one thing, actually. But this time, all those little things didn't revolve solely around Kaitou, himself, but more around the detective that had been his hostage. Not that the situation was truly a 'hostage' situation, in Nakamori's mind. There were too many flaws in their little performance to go overlooked.

The night was still fresh in his mind as he thought back on it. He'd run over this scenario in his mind countless times, trying to find little clues he might not have noted before. Once he had made it to the roof, he'd shouted at KID loud enough to disrupt his officers.

Note to self: get _rid_ of that thing.

Next, after KID had thrown the smoke bomb, there had been enough confusion to allow the thief to slip between the officers and get to Kudo. From there he had held the young detective at gunpoint; neither seemed to have notice that the safety was still in place.

That had been his first observation.

Then, after the demand for the switch had been made, he'd noticed just how silly the entire thing was beginning to get. Said switch was dangling limply from Kudo's right hand; right next to KID. The device could have easily been snagged with little struggle from the boy. Not that there was any to be seen.

That was his second observation.

As if to prove this already blatant fact, once the trade had been agreed upon, KID let his arm slack from around Kudo's throat. If there had been any real desire, it would have been easy to break away and escape to freedom. Nakamori knew just how good the boy was at soccer, and his leg strength was quite impressive. It would have been a piece of cake for him to make a run for it. Maybe even take the jewel with him. But he didn't.

That had been the third observation.

It was for these reasons that he knew for a fact that not only was Kudo in no danger, but it was possible he was even _with_ KID. And that gave him plenty enough to worry. How many times had he been on KID's heists? How often had he helped KID get away in tight spots? But one good thing did come out of all of this.

He knew KID's partner; he could track him.

And he would waste no time in doing so.

Within a couple of hours, he had men following the high school detective's every move. They were noting every single detail: action, behaviors, habits. By the end of the day, there wasn't a single move that the boy took that wasn't documented and then reported back to Nakamori.

But even with this, there were no leads.

Several days of following Kudo ensued, but there was nothing that called his attention. No secret phone calls, no looking over his shoulder suspiciously, no going down mysterious alleys, no meetings with shady people.

The very next day, Nakamori himself followed him. Since early in the morning, the only odd behavior he'd seen Kudo perform was sit in his empty house, alone in the library, and just read a thick tome until he was late for school. Sherlock Holmes had never been the inspector's fancy, so it was a little difficult to see the allure of it. Besides, what could be so great about it that Kudo risked decapitation? That girl, the one that waited outside his door for him, nearly took off his head when he finally emerged. Some girls were _scary_.

Nakamori loosened his necktie and sighed.

This was going to be a long day.

Both teens leisurely walked down the busy street, chatting aimlessly to one another as they went. Most of the topics that were mentioned held little interest to Nakamori, however, and seeing as he had bugged the inside of the young detective's collar, he had no choice but to listen. He thought he just might die of the boredom.

After all, for a man who set out to find the Kaitou KID, how interesting was talk about some theme park?

He dogged after them all the way to the school yard, but not once along the way did the KID pop up in conversation. No matter _how_ many time the situation called for it. First, they passed a TV store where a broadcast about the thief was blaring.

Both ignored it.

Then they passed by a newspaper stand where KID was on the front cover with big, bold headlines and a giant picture.

They just walked on by.

At one point in time the girl (Ran, was it?) brought up KID, but to this dismay, Kudo just wouldn't keep on the subject. It was obvious he was avoiding talking about it. Nakamori kept his head low and waited. The moment would come soon. Just one slip up. Just one; then he would have him.

The day dragged by, and the sun blazed hotter and hotter down the inspector's back as he crouched in the shrubs outside the school. Jacket and tie had already long since been discarded about him, and he was now flapping his collar, just for some sort of relief. Why did the sun have to be so cruel to him today? It wasn't as if he had enough problems to begin with.

He was a full grown man, sitting in the bushes outside a school, in the heat, angry as hell, and watching the windows with a pair of binoculars.

Yeah, nothing about that description screamed: _Pedophile!_ at all.

Despite how it looked, he had to keep his vigil. Not for a single moment could he slack off, lest he miss that one clue he so desperately needed. That didn't mean that he had never in his life detested school as much as he did at that moment. And his subject, currently staring off out of the window of the third story, didn't look so thrilled by it, either. Ducking a little lower in the branches, Nakamori zoomed in on the boy's face. His blue eyes were glazed and dreamy, just looking out into nothing. Whatever the teacher was ranting about was obviously much less interesting that whatever was going on in the teen's mind.

Nakamori brought down the binoculars and blinked his strained eyes repeatedly. The sun's reflections off the glass were giving him a powerful headache. Sighing, he again lifted the black seeing device to his eyes. How long was this whole thing going to take, anyways? In the background, the teacher scrawled gibberish on the whiteboard. What class was he in? Some foreign language, by the looks of it. Wait, what was that? Was he muttering something? Perhaps he should turn the bug back on, now. At the beginning of the class, Kudo had removed his jacket, and since Nakamori really didn't want an earful of whatever the teacher was raving about, he'd turned the bug off.

But then he saw Kudo's mouth form the one word he'd been waiting to hear all day.

Kaitou.

Frantically, he began to search for the switch to the bug. Why were things never where they were supposed to be when he needed them? Ah, there it was. He tore it out of his coat pocket and flicked the device to life; just in time to hear the last few words filter through.

"_-ou do to me."_

What the hell was that supposed to mean? He listened intently to the receiver, but the only other words he caught were those of the teacher's. Groaning, he put it down. _Ou do to me._ He groaned and scratched the back of his head. It must mean something important, but what? He needed to find a way to decipher it, a way _awa__y_ from the heat. With a huff, he shifted back into his previous position. He might actually kill someone if he had to sit here much longer.

After the morning's excitement, the rest of the day passed in an uneventful blur. He had sat in that godforsaken bush for who knew how long, got a _nasty_ sunburn on the back of his neck, and didn't manage to get a shred more of useful information out of Kudo. Hours of being forced on his haunches, for nothing more than a sentence. Both temper and temperature wise, he was _boiling_. He wanted nothing more, at that moment, than to just get into his office and sit there.

He trudged back up to his desk and plopped down into his nice cushioned seat. Little comforts. Never knew how much you could miss them until they're gone. He was never going to do something like that again. _Ever_. Much too much of a hassle for so little of compensation. Just a single ambiguous phrase. _Ou do to me. _He pulled at his hair in frustration. What did it _mean?_ He didn't have a clue.

And he still didn't have a clue the day after. After an all-nighter, even. There had been no breakthroughs. Tensions were running high; his most of all. The other officers knew well enough to leave him be when he got like this. No one dared approach him. Until that night. And they told him something he really didn't want to hear.

Kudo had gone missing.

* * *

**A/N:** Gah! This took way too long to edit. I think my brain is fried. Thanks to **BlueItem **for going over it again, just to make sure I didn't miss anything. Which I _did_. So thanks. Holy friggin' frick, guys, this was _brutal. _Way worse than chapter one.

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**Ending Song Time!**

"_Lisztomania,_

_think less but see it grow,_

_like a ride, like a ride, oh,_

_discuss, discuss, discuss,_

_discuss, discuss, discouraged."_

**Song:** Lisztomania** Artist:** Phoenix


	3. Breaking Glass

**Captive of Midnight's Hold**

**Started On: **07/14/08 05:33:37 PM

**Chapter Three:** Broken Glass (Edited)

**Edited:** 09/03/12 2:00:43 AM (I don't even know when I first started to edit this)

**Author's Note:** I had to change quite a few things in this chapter, but none of it should make it so that the rest of the story doesn't read right. I just _had_ to do something to make it a little less corny. And I finally had to get back around to it due to the story's adoption.

* * *

By the time he reached the doorstep, his legs were trembling with fatigue.

He lifted each foot to the higher elevation, but they threatened to give out on him with every step. He rubbed uselessly at his reddened eyes; they were begging him for relief, for sleep. He knew that once he was inside he would collapse into a heap on the floor, but the warmth of indoors was such a desired concept, he could care less. Just so long as he could get inside.

But first he had to conquer these steps.

He winced as his sore feet ascended further. He had been awake for over an entire day, almost two, running all across the city. Not that such behavior was abnormal for him, as of late. For near three months he'd been doing this exact same thing. Leaving no stone unturned and no estranged strings un-pulled. Yet all for nothing. He hadn't managed to get any closer to finding the one he'd been searching for.

Kudo.

Kaito's most recent stunt had led him to infiltrating the boy's school. Fed up on trying to get his answers via observation, he'd decided to take a more direct approach and just ask people the questions he wanted answered. He'd had _enough_ beating around the bush. It had been time to change tact. However, by doing so he'd caught the very much unwanted attention of Kudo's friend Ran. She hounded him with questions, demanding answers that he really didn't have the liberty to give answers to, and with others he simply didn't have an answer to give. _Why was he looking for Shinichi?_ He knew the obvious answer. He wanted his own answers. Maybe because he missed his only real challenge, as well? Or was it something more?

He missed his friend.

And he was going to do whatever it took to get him back again.

Which led him back to the stairs.

Spikes of pain shot through the soles of his feet and streaked through his legs. Those few more steps still seemed like a long way off. Maybe sleeping on the cement wasn't such a horrible idea.

At last he conquered the stairway and bore his weight on the door, which seemed to sigh as it opened to allow him entrance. The door closed, and all was dark.

To the left was the living room, he knew, which housed the beige sofa he hated and his mother loved, but of which he was currently changing his mind about. It certainly was a lot closer than his bed, which he longed for, but resided at the top of the stairs. Up those long, long, long stairs.

To the sofa, it was.

He collapsed unceremoniously unto the furnishing. His legs and feet were throbbing with effort. He'd gone too long without sleeping, which was doing his body no favors; let alone his mind. Everything _hurt_.

Everything.

He ground his teeth together and shoved his face into the armrest of the sofa. Where could he go that he hadn't already looked? Was he outside the city? Outside the country? How could someone disappear so suddenly and not leave a single trace? Well, someone who wasn't KID? But Kudo was just as cunning as he, himself, was, wasn't he? If he didn't want to be found, he wouldn't.

Which made a pang of confusion and jealousy sear hot inside him.

What could possibly make Kudo want to disappear?

And why did he even care?

Well, it was because they were friends, right? Adversaries, sure, but they balanced each other. There was no malice behind any of their actions. They complimented each other's intellect and drive for excitement. He curled further into himself. It was normal to be concerned about your friends, wasn't it?

Then why did that not seem to fit right?

He frowned into the cushion. It scared him, how much Kudo had come to mean to him. All those heists, all those chases. It felt like Kudo knew him better than so many others, despite not even knowing his name. There was a connection there.

Kaito snickered to himself, humorlessly. How had this all happened? How had this one person come to mean to very much to him? He hadn't even seen it coming. And now that he knew it existed, how was he supposed to cope?

How was he supposed to keep on if Kudo wasn't going to be there?

The thief buried his face in his arms in an attempt to escape his own thoughts. He had to stop thinking like this. It was getting him far too depressed. Too many negative thoughts. Too many thoughts, period. He sighed and rolled onto his back. The constant turmoil in his mind was finally exhausting him completely, and sleep was setting in. A dark place, comforting and secure; he let it overtake him.

To a place where he could dream.

But dark thoughts still managed to bleed through, into this place of sanctity. He would have no rest.

Startled awake, Kaito groaned and rolled to his side. His entire body was sore. He tried to pry his eyes open but he only managed to get a bleary look at the sofa before he had to close them again. What time was it? What day was it? He couldn't open his eyes, let alone get up to look at the calendar. It wasn't because he was tired, even though he was. It just hurt too much. He groaned again when he tried to lift up his arm. He was going to get up. He couldn't spend all day on the sofa, after all. His thoughts might creep up on him again, and after being haunted by his dreams all night, he wasn't about to let it happen. At least not for a little while.

After about a half an hour of inching his way, he finally managed to get into a sitting position. His muscles protested fiercely, but Kaito was never one to sit still for long amounts of time. He shook his head, trying to clear it from rouge trains of consciousness that were trying to seep through. It was too early to think and he was determined to keep it that way. He needed something to distract him.

_Briiiiiiiiing!_

The phone rang.

He stared at it as if he couldn't recognize the device on the wall. In his sleep-addled state, he couldn't think of why anyone could possibly be calling him. He could find out if he'd answer, but the action of sitting up had already drained him. It was a long stretch between where he sat to the phone, and the distance distorted in his mind to something insurmountable. No, it was simply out of the question. There was no way in hell he was going to move.

It kept ringing.

And kept ringing.

Oh, for goodness' sake, was the machine ever going to pick up?

He glared at it with as much heat as he could muster, but the shrill siren did not cease, and so he levered himself up and sulked to the device. Whoever was on the other side of this line was going to get a piece of his mind.

"_What?_" he snarled. "Who is this?"

"Kaito!" was the _loud_ reply. Loud and angry. Aoko. Wonderful. And now his ear, the only thing that hadn't been hurting, definitely _was_.

"Aoko? What is it? What do you want?" He didn't have the energy to try to act chipper, or even less angry. He just wanted her to leave him alone.

"You didn't answer any of my calls," she demanded.

Kaito scratched the back of his head. "What calls?"

"What calls?!" Aoko screeched. Kaito held the phone away from his ear. "The thirteen or so calls from last night! I _must've_ been calling until midnight!" she ranted. He shook his head. He hadn't come home until well around three in the morning, so of course he hadn't gotten any of her calls.

"Sorry Aoko, I must have been asleep," he tried.

She called him on his bluff. "Yeah _right_. You were out searching again, weren't you?" She knew him so well, didn't she? It was rather inconvenient.

The phone started to slide from his slack hand, but he caught it before it could fall. "W-why would you say that?"

"Akoko told me she saw you running around the city, so I knew that was what you must've been doing." Her anger had slipped into something quieter, which was good news for his ear, but put him on edge. He really didn't want to have to deal with this right now. Couldn't she just mind her own business?

"Then why did you call so many times?" he snapped.

"Why else? I was worried, you _idiot_. How long were you even out for?"

He groaned. "Does it really matter, Aoko?" he bit back, scornfully. He didn't want to be reminded that his search had come up empty handed, again, despite the countless hours he had searched. He did that well enough on his own, thanks.

"Kaito... I'm worried. You might get hurt if you keep doing this to yourself. Why do you even keep looking for this Kudo person? Why is he so important?"

Kaito's heart lodged itself in his throat. He hadn't really come to a conclusion last night, nor his resolve. Everything was still so difficult to come to terms with in his own mind. Why was Kudo so important? He couldn't really explain it to himself, let alone Aoko. If anyone, it should have been her, but it wasn't. She was his childhood companion and nothing more. Shinichi was something else entirely.

"It doesn't matter, Aoko. Just forget about it. It's not important." He rested his head against the wall. He was so tired. He just wanted to make his mind stop. He just wanted to sleep.

There was an uncomfortable silence before she replied again.

"It must be important to you if you're willing to put so much effort into it," she said, wisely. "I won't pry for answers, Kaito. Just know I'm willing to help anyway I can."

He wish he had the energy to smile. "Thank you, Aoko."

"Now," she began, briskly. "I bet you're not even ready yet, are you?"

His head sprung up. "Ready for what?"

"_Idiot!_ School starts in fifteen minutes!"

Crap.

"..."

"Kaito?"

But he didn't reply, because that would take too much precious time away from his mad dash to prepare, body protesting the entire way. He could do this. Just another day of school. Something to take his mind off everything else.

* * *

He panted heavily as he stood outside the door to his classroom. He had ended up being late even though he had run all the way there. Now he was wishing he had just stayed at home and slept. Missing one day of school wouldn't kill him. But his mother might. He shivered at the thought. Staying at school seemed less fatal. In any case, staying home would not help him feel any better. He needed the distraction.

He opened the door slowly and peaked inside. The teacher was writing something on the board and seemed to be into a very long lecture about it. Maybe he could just sneak to his desk without her noticing. He opened the door a little bit wider and slipped through. She didn't turn around to berate him. So far so good. She was still busy chatting away as he creeped his way towards his desk beside Aoko. She was giving him a concerned look but he just waved her off and continued on. Just a bit farther. He turned back to see if he was clear and when he was perfectly sure that he was unseen he made the last couple steps to his seat. As he snaked his way into a sitting position the teacher finally spun around.

"So the answer is (3X, 1/2Y). Did everyone get that?"

The class nodded in unison and scribbled notes on the papers before them. Well, maybe some of them were notes. Most of them were probably doodles and other things that had nothing to do with the lesson. But what the teacher didn't know wouldn't hurt her.

Kaito slid lower in his chair as he glared at the equation on the board. It was fairly simple math. At least for him. And it was not nearly challenging enough to preoccupy his mind. He then felt a sharp nudge in his side, and he bolted upright in his seat.

"Ow, Aoko!" he hissed. "What did you do that for?" Aoko just looked at him defiantly and pushed a scrap of paper at him. Was she going to let him copy her notes? That wasn't like her. Not that he needed it, but she knew that. He took the piece of paper and unfolded it behind the textbook he had propped up on his desk.

It read: _Teacher knows you were late. She wants to talk to you after class. I tried to get you out of it but she persisted. I think she wants to know why you've been late so much_.

He grimaced at the note. Why did she need to know? It seemed like a lot of people had been in his business. As if he didn't have enough to worry about without their nosing about. He mentally hit himself in the head.

And he had tried to be stealthy. He felt like an idiot. Apparently his lack of sleep was interfering with his ability to go unnoticed. And that was dangerous.

He scribbled a reply on the note and passed it back to Aoko. She didn't even bother to read it; she just slid it off her desk and into her pocket. It didn't matter much anyways, as he had only written: "**Got it, thanks.**"

He sighed and brought down the book before him. The teacher had gone back to lecturing but it didn't interest him. Instead, he found more entertainment with staring aimlessly around the room. But the only problem with that was the fact that by not concentrating on anything, little things began to sneak their way into his mind.

Where could Kudo be?

How did he go missing?

Was he in trouble, or was he hiding?

What if Kaito never saw him again?

Was it something he could have prevented?

What if he had something to do with his disappearance?

Was Kudo made a target because of KID?

Was he _hurt_ because of KID?

What if—

"Kaito!"

He shot up at the sound of his name, but a bit to roughly and quick. With a yelp, he crashed to the floor and the entire class fell silent. He looked up, dazed, to see the teacher fuming over him.

"Sorry about that," he said, feigning cheeriness, despite the thudding of his heart. The teacher shook her head and pointed to the door.

"Out, Kaito. First you come in late, and then you disrupt my class! Go wait in the hall until class is over. I need to have a word with you."

A few students near him chuckled to themselves at his expense. Oh, how he wished he could be anywhere else other then there. Stuck in a school full of arrogant jerks that only seemed to want to torment him. He hated it. What right did they have to amuse themselves with his pain? Didn't he have enough problems to deal with?

He slowly rose to his feet and walked out to the door, the students' snickers trailing him out. He closed the door behind him with a soft thump and leaned up against the wall, hands clenched into fists and teeth grinding together. He hated this: the way that everything seemed to be crashing down around him. He couldn't find Kudo. He couldn't find Pandora. He couldn't stop the pain he was causing others. He couldn't stop things from going wrong. Even if he tried, he only seemed to make things worse. That just made the students' laughter all the more disheartening. It felt like they were laughing not only at the fact he was yelled at by the teacher, but at all the mistakes he had made. It echoed in his ears over and over, pushing away all other thoughts except for his faults. His failures.

He hated it all.

He wanted it all to stop. To disappear.

No, that was impossible.

All his problems wouldn't simply vanish from his life as if they had never happened.

But they could, if the reason—the _source_ of the problems resolved itself.

He had to disappear.

After all, he was the Kaitou KID.

* * *

**AN: **By the end, I decided it was good enough and just did more editing than rewriting. I had to rewrite almost everything at the beginning, so it was a relief to not have to do _everything_ over again.

* * *

**Ending song time!**

_"Let me fly,_

_Man, I need a release from,_

_This troublesome mind,_

_Fix my feet when they're stumbling,_

_And, well, you know it hurts sometimes,_

_You know it's gonna bleed sometimes."_

**Song: **Sweet Talk** Artist: **The Killers


	4. Staining Glass

Staining Glass

Quote From Story: He glanced back at the card as he thought deep and hard. Thinking about reasons of why. Why should he? Why shouldn't he?

Started on: 7/17/2008 06:25:58 PM

WARNING!! I am rating this one chapter M for the time being (Just to be safe)

Notice: Ok this is it!! This is probably my favorite chapter so far. I'm hoping you like it too!! I'm currently reading Sherlock Holmes in The Hound Of The Baskervilles. It's kinda confusing to read but I really like it!! I'm also really hyper about the fact that tomorrow I get to go see WALL-E! I've wanted to see that movie for a while now and...oops getting off topic. Oh yeah! I also think I'm actually going to switch into Shinichi's POV for once. Um well I'm kinda going to have to because of-Whoops!! Guess you'll just have to read and find out huh? Then...

ONTO THE STORY!!

* * *

Kaito sighed as he sat with his face in his arms. Class would be over soon and the teacher would come out to talk to him. He wasn't looking forward to that in the least. He sighed again and closed his eyes. Listening to the ticking of his wristwatch. Wishing for time to stand still. He smiled to himself for the first time all month. Though it was as far from joyous as could be. He was smirking at the irony. It hadn't been that long since he had been wishing for time to speed up.

He shook his head and nuzzled into his arms harder. Thinking about that day was the last thing he wanted to do at the moment. Well that and talk to the teacher. He didn't see why he had to do it in the first place. It wasn't any of her business as far as he was concerned. She didn't need to know. She would probably just give him some stupid lecture about needing to concentrate in school more or send him to a counselor. He didn't need someone else to tell him what he already knew. That was all that a counselor would do probably.

He leaned back and ran his fingers along his face. So why should he let them? What if he were to walk away right now? He looked at his watch. He had a couple minutes before the end of class. No one was going to stop him. He looked down the hallway and stared at the wide double doors. He might as well. They were right there. Not taking another second to think he placed a hand on his knee and got to his feet. Then headed straight out of the building.

Outside forbidding storm clouds had overtook the sky. Shadowing the ground in a veil of gray. It was funny wasn't it? That whenever you were in a horrible mood it began to rain just to make everything worse? Hilarious.

He stuffed his hands into his pockets and kept his head down. Mumbling ill-tempered threats at the sky while he watched his own feet pad along the cement walkway. Now even Mother Nature seemed to be upset with him. What had he done to deserve this?

Then he heard footsteps approaching him. He held his breath and retreated best he could into the collar of his school uniform. With his luck it was probably a teacher. He walked a bit faster until the footsteps were as loud as his own. But to his surprise they didn't stop in front of him. They just kept on going past. That was when he noticed that there wasn't just one set of footsteps but two. He let out his breath as they began to fade behind him. It seemed that his luck actually managed to hold out.

But then the footsteps came to a sudden halt. His heart lurched and he sped up his pace towards the gate leading off school grounds. The footsteps followed. He began to jog. So did his unknown pursuer. He clenched his teeth and began a full on sprint. He was _not_ about to get caught. He raced forwards but the strain on his legs was slowing him down. They still hurt like hell. He didn't make it very far before he was roughly jerked back and spun around. He just about lost his footing but the hand on his shoulder kept him standing.

He gaped at the person standing before him. And she seemed just as shocked to see him. "R-Ran?" he rasped.

"You're not...you're that boy that came to our school!" she shouted pulling her hand away from him. "The one that was looking for Shinichi!"

He blinked his eyes several times. He wasn't quite registering the fact that she was there. He was supposed to make a quick getaway before class ended but the seconds were ticking by as he stood there. He had to get moving again. Or else his teacher really would send him somewhere. He got the feeling though it wasn't going to be the counselor.

"Sorry Ran I've really gotta go" he said as he began to turn around.

"Oh no you don't! I want you to tell me who you are! AND what you wanted with Shinichi!" she tugged on his uniform sleeve and forced him to face her.

Then he noticed something at her feet. Well not so much something more of someone. A spectacled kid that was staring intensively at him. His bright blue eyes locked with his own. It was slightly unnerving the way he looked as if he was sizing him up. But not so much as the fact of why he was doing it but more of _how_ he was doing it. His breath instantly caught in his throat and his face contorted with pain. Just like Shinichi.

Now he was thinking about him so much that he was seeing his features in other people. He needed to get home. Fast.

But that seemed impossible with the way Ran held a death grip on his coat. He didn't have enough time to be wasting with her. So he risked his final option. He reached into his coat with his other hand to try and pull something out to help him flee but as he did so she gave him another hard jerk and the contents of his inner pocket came spilling out.

He let out a loud yelp and ripped himself away from Ran's grip just as a huge puff of smoke erupted around them. Great! Just what he needed. Something to draw the attention of the entire school towards him! He scowled and scrambled to pick everything up off the ground. Then he heard it.

The school bell rang.

He didn't waste any more time and bolted out of the smoke and through the gate getting as much distance as he could between himself and that reached place. His legs burned but he wouldn't allow himself to stop. Not with the chance that Ran might follow him yet again. He roughly rushed past people on the streets getting several curses thrown at him in the process but he didn't care. He just wanted to get home. Get away from everyone and everything possible.

I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I

The boy coughed hard as the gray smoke gathered around him. That guy had thrown a smoke bomb! What sort of student would have one of those on them? But then again he didn't really believe that boy was a student. He had even placed one of the stickers that was so conveniently located and concealed on his vest's button. Within that sticker though was a tiny tracking device. Ran had said that he had come to his school asking about Shinichi. He wasn't about to risk the chance that maybe that guy had been someone dangerous. That was right after 'the incident' at Tropical Land. Those men in black that had caused it could have sent a spy to make sure the job was done. After all they believed that the poison they had given Shinichi would kill him. Not turn him into a six-year-old kid. Who he was now.

"Conan-kun!!" yelled a voice through the smoke to him. He let out another string of coughs and waved his hand in front of his face. The smoke was beginning to clear somewhat.

"I'm ok Ran-neechan." he shouted back as he got to his knees. He had dropped a lot of things before the smoke went off. Maybe he could find something that could help him with his identity. He ran his fingers over the course sidewalk until his fingers ran over something. It was some sort of wallet. Black in color and sleek like plastic. He put it in his pocket and continued searching. The smoke had all but disappeared by now and intrigued students had formed a circle around them muttering amongst themselves about what they thought could be going on.

The smoke had completely vanished by this point so Conan got back up to his feet. There was nothing else left on the sidewalk except for streaks of black that came from when the bomb was first thrown. He looked back at Ran who was shaking bits of smoke out of her uniform. Talking to herself about promises she would keep if she ever saw that guy again. He laughed somewhat and walked up next to her.

"What a creep. You all right Conan-kun?" she asked as she flattened out her skirt. He nodded and opened his mouth to speak but as he did a voice came from behind him.

"I can't believe that he did that. Are you all right?" He turned around and looked into the face of the one who spoke. For a second he was confused. She looked like Ran. But after taking a closer look he noticed key differences between them. Her hair was much wavier and she didn't have quite the same facial qualities he had become to know in Ran. Also she was a bit taller he noticed as she went over to talk to Ran. He studied her for a second longer before Ran began talking.

"Did you know him?" she queried. The girl beside her nodded her head but then to Conan's surprise shot back around. "Don't you people have something better to do!?" she barked. The crowd seemed a little taken aback by this sudden outburst as well but before long they left and congregated around various parts of the school grounds. Leaving the two girls to talk in a bit more privacy. Of course Conan was listening in on every word uttered between the two of them.

"Yes he's a friend of mine. He's been acting strange lately but I never thought he'd just up and leave like that." Ran looked at her confused.

"What do you mean up and leave?" Then she glanced down at her watch. "Was he ditching class?" The girl nodded.

"Like I said a minute ago he's been acting really odd. Ever since that Kudo Shinichi guy disappeared anyways." Ran raised her eyebrows and shook her head.

"But Shinichi's not missing! He calls every so often to let me know he's ok even! But why would that bother him that he couldn't find Shinichi?"

Conan was just as confused by this. As far as he knew he didn't know that guy. He dug into his pocket and retrieved the black wallet. Opening it up a few things caught his eye. First off was the student ID card in the picture slot. He turned the wallet to the side so he could read it.

Name: Kaito Kuroba

Age: 17

Sex: Male

School: Ekoda High

He looked over the picture. There was something familiar about it but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. He just looked really...familiar. He turned the wallet back and began to rummage through the other cards. There was a library card, a card to some place called Mystic Mikes, and other little things that he didn't see could possibly help him. He opened up the coin holder part of it to reveal several scraps of paper. They were receipts. The first one was from a restaurant not too far from where they were now for a bowl of soup. He looked at the next one. That one was for that Mystic Mike's place for several decks or playing cards. Dated...about two weeks ago. He filed through the other pieces of paper. It seemed to be more of the same thing. He neatly replaced the wallet in his pocket and looked back up at the two girls. He had been concentrating on the wallet so much he had lost track of the conversation.

"No way he's Kuroba Toichi's son! That famous magician? Well that would explain why he was carrying that smoke bomb then and this weird gun." Conan head shot up to Ran.

"What weird gun?" he asked tugging at he skirt to draw her attention to him.

"This, I picked it up when we were in the smoke. I think he dropped it." She opened up her school uniform and brought out a silver gun. It _was_ strange though. It didn't look like a regular handgun. But not like a toy either. It definitely looked like it could shoot a bullet out. What kind of bullet though? Maybe a 25 caliber...but then an idea shot through his head.

"Ran-neechan can I please see that?" he asked reaching out his hand. She looked at the gun and then back to him.

"Be VERY careful with it ok." she slowly bent down and placed it in his hand. The other girl nodded again.

"Kaito-kun would never have anything dangerous on him it's fine."

Conan took the gun and looked it over. Running it over his hands. Examining it. Then aiming it.

"What are you doing Cona-" Ran was cut off as he pulled the trigger on the gun sending a loud ring through all of their ears. He lowered the gun and looked ahead at the tree a couple feet away. No bullet. An ace of spades.

He just about dropped the gun as the gears began to turn in his head. Ignoring the stunned expressions of Ran and the other girl. And the kid standing next to the tree too afraid to move.

Kaito _Kuroba_

Son of _Kuroba_ Toichi who died _8_ years ago

same time the Kaito Kid stopped making appearances

and he was a _magician_

with a handgun that shoots _metal playing cards_

he had a history deep enough to be worried about _him_

and even looked somewhat like he did _as_ Shinichi

He placed his hand on his forehead as a mocking voice echoed in his head. Trying to not pay attention the drops of water that had begun to hit the back of it.

_"Have you ever thought about taking up magic? Or acting? Or both? I could always use a stunt double...or an accomplice!!"_

_KAITO KID_

He felt his heart jump into his throat. Could it really be him? His friend behind the snowy white attire? His heart began to pump harder and louder in his ears. He had to see. To make sure. If he really was the Kaito Kid he had to know. He raised his shaky hand to the rim of his glasses to activate the tracker. A glowing red appeared on the screen. He watched it for a moment. It wasn't moving. Maybe if he was lucky he could make it to him before he decided to take off again. He looked up at Ran and shouted at her.

"I wanna go check something be right back!" and before she even had a chance to protest he was gone out the gate.

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Ran shook her head. Gone again. He was always running off places. It worried her but he always came back fine. The girl beside her spoke up again and she turned.

"What are you doing here in the first place?" she asked. She blinked at her confused before something finally clicked in her head. She dug around in her pocket then brought up a small yellow box.

"I was supposed to give this to a teacher here by the name of...Mizuki Hitoku. But since you're here do you think you could show me where he is?" the other girl nodded.

"Come on this way" she pointed to the school. Ran nodded and followed her into the building. She would search for Conan in a few minutes. He would be fine for that time.

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He ran for what seemed like ages before he finally turned to a familiar street. He franticly ran past house after house before he finally came up to the tower of concrete stairs that led to his own. As fast as his legs would permit he marched up those damned stairs to his front door. He panted heavily as he pushed his way through. He finally made it. He locked the door behind him and leaned against it trying to catch his breath. At least here he wouldn't have to deal with anyone else. His mom should've already left for work and would be gone for at least a couple more days. He would have the house to himself until she returned.

He released a relieved sigh and looked at the stairs in front of him. This time he was going to make it back to his own room. He took a deep breath and began to drag his aching legs up the steps. Relying a great deal on the handrail for support.

32 agonizing steps later he made it to the top wheezing. That had taken a whole lot more out of him than he thought it would. It didn't help that he was already exhausted from the run there too. He was hating the bastard who ever thought up the concept of stairs.

He stumbled forwards down the dark corridor with only his hand on the wall for guidance. His mom always shut the windows up tight in case it got really hot during the day and since he could find the light switch he settled with roaming in the dark. It wasn't that difficult after all it was his house. He knew where he was going.

He fingers slid over to cool wall and then abruptly divvied.

Door 1: Bathroom. He continued along until his fingers passed another divot.

Door 2: Study.

He was getting closer.

After a few more moments he reached his destination.

Door 3: Bedroom. He squinted as his eyes slowly became adjusted to the darkness. He could sort of make out the faint outline of the handle. He grasped it and let himself into his room glad to see its unchanged appearance. Posters of various magicians and bands were strewn all over the light blue walls. A wooden desk sat in the corner piled high with papers and small gadgets. All with secret purposes. On the opposite wall was his bed, still neat and pressed as he had left it nights before. He headed right for it and collapsed on the cotton sheets.

His mind was beginning to run on empty. He didn't want to think about anything anymore. He wanted all this turmoil in his mind to go away. To not have to worry about anything. He stared vacantly at the wall beside him. And there _was_ a way to do just that. A solution that had been edging at most of his attention a lot recently. He sat up and dug into his pocket and after a moment of searching he brought forth a metal playing card. He gazed at it longingly before setting it down beside him on the bed. Could he do it? Would he even dare? He glanced back at the card as he thought deep and hard. Thinking about reasons of why. Why should he? Why shouldn't he?

He had been a failure at recovering Pandora

He had always caused trouble to just about everyone

He was always a worry to those around him

He lost the one he loved

And probably because of himself.

That part hit the hardest. The Black Organization must've gotten to him. Kudo would have never been in any danger had it not been for him. Just because he was Kid. Well if they had done that to someone who didn't even know anything about him what would they do if they ever found out that he was Kid? That would put everyone he knew in danger. They would probably do the same to them as they had done to Kudo. His mom, the rest of his family, his friends, they would all be killed for sure.

He dug his nails into the side of his head and choked down a sob. Why did this all have to happen to him? Why did he become the Kaito Kid even though he knew of the dangers? Had he really been so arrogant? He reached out and grabbed the card with his right hand while his other had pushed up his sleeve.

But wouldn't his mom be sad? Aoko? Hakuba?

But they would eventually get over it and move on.

He brought the sharp metal edge closer to his skin and paused only to let a tear drop down onto the back of his hand. Was that really the only reason he could think of? He shook his head and more tears fell into his lap. It wasn't worth it.

_He _wasn't worth it.

So he slid the cold metal edge across his skin harshly drawing forth as much strength as he could and put it into this one little cut.

The final cut.

He watched silently as the sticky red substance surfaced from the cut. Running in streams down the side of his wrist and dripping to the wooden floor. At first he felt panicked as he gazed at the growing pool of blood at his feet. It was spilling from him at an alarming rate. His heart began to drum in his chest. But the longer he watched the less scared he became. He stared at the river on his wrist and listened to the drip of his own blood. It fell in sync with the rain that had begun to pound on his window. Everything was going to disappear. Just like he wanted. He lie back down upon the soft cotton sheets and let the tears flow freely from the corners of his eyes as he mumbled a last couple words.

"It's better this way"

* * *

Aw man I just watched something creepy!! This show called "Fear Itself". It was way freaky!! I can't really explain it but I've gotta say that it will probably give me nightmares tonight. One good thing came out of it though...it helped me with the ending of this chapter!! Hurray for late night horror shows!! Ok I'm gonna ask really really nicely. "PRETTY PRETTY PLEASE REVIEW!! I mean C'mon it will take you all of 10 seconds to write a short review. Help me out here!! So please be a really really nice person and do that for me? You're the best!! Then one last thing before I go. I'd really like to give a big round of applause to Shinigami-huntress for helping me with the start of this chapter (I really needed help) and to nataeiy1 for giving me a bunch of ideas with your stories!! Ok well that's it for now so 'til next time, onto the ending song!!

_"Don't you know, _

_that misery loves company,_

_yeah hoah that misery was looking for me _

_happiness is a face that don't look good on me, _

_yeah hoah that misery comes looking for me" _

Song: Misery By: Good Charlotte


	5. Doubt

**Started:** 7/29/2008 3:00:42 PM

**Disclaimer:** God I so wish I owned Detective Conan but unfortunately I don't. Life's cruel that way sometimes.

**Quote From Story:** He looked like he was debating on hitting him across the face or lunging himself at him.

**Notice:** Jeez sorry it took me so long to get this out! I kind of had issues thinking up ideas after I finished the last chapter. Not to mention the fact that nataeiy1's plunnies got to me and I ended up writing New Years Day. (Man those things are vicious!) I hope they don't get out again 'cause tonight is another episode of "Fear Itself." My fingers still hurt from typing! Though I still managed to get out Chapter 5. So without further adieu here it is: Chapter 5: Doubt: in all it's glory!! Hehe!!

(This chapter was fun to write though not quite as much as the last)

ONTO THE STORY!!

* * *

Conan's heart was drumming in his chest as he ran through the crowded streets. Cursing that his small body couldn't move faster. He was trying hard to keep his mind focused on the glowing red dot on his glasses without running into someone or something. A task that was proving to be much more difficult than he thought it would be he realized as he just managed to dodge an oncoming bystander. He swore inwardly at all the people blocking his path. It was taking twice as long as he would have hoped for.

He rounded a corner at lightning quick speed. It took great skill to keep from sliding off on the drenched pavement. The rain hadn't let up sense he began his sprint. It was only a couple more streets away to the red dot's location. He was getting extremely excited as he thought about it. The Kaito Kid was there! The one person who had been on his mind ever since the incident that shrunk him. The flash of white that haunted his dreams at night. His friend and rival. Maybe even more. He wouldn't deny it. He liked the Phantom Thief. But he settled for being his friend long ago. After all it was painfully obvious that that was all he was ever going to be to him. He could live with that. Didn't always like it but he could live with it as long as he could be close to him.

That was why when the thief stopped making appearances that he was so utterly crushed.

But now it didn't matter. If he was right then this Kaito Kuroba person was his vanished friend. He nearly glided over the pavement as his speed picked up. Finally he would get to see him again! He was so overwhelmed with excitement that he almost missed the street he needed to turn on. Once he finally made it though he slowed his pace. The street was lined with beautiful mansions. They reminded him of his own somewhat. He hurriedly walked past the chain link boundaries that fenced them inside. Scanning the address plates as he did so. Not that he needed to with the tracking device still enabled but he didn't want to look suspicious.

He passed house after house until he came to one near the very end of the street. The house was definitely very large and it held a certain air of…mischief? Was the right word? He checked the red dot on his glasses to be sure and then raced up the cement stairs to the front door. He reached up and was just barely able to reach the doorbell. It rang long and deep. He waited a few moments but when no one came he rang it again. Again no one came. He raised one of his eyebrows. The dot was definitely here then why wasn't he answering? He backed up a bit out of the shade from the awning and looked up. All the windows in the house we shut up tight. He couldn't tell if anyone was there at all.

Irritated he shouted out for Kaito. But still no one came out to him. He frowned and looked from side to side. Maybe…he thought as he jumped off the patio and walked towards the side of the house. Yes! There it was! He ran forwards until he was just underneath the fire escape. Of course it was only natural for such a large house like this to have another way to escape if such a thing as a fire did occur. Somehow though Conan could see this escape route being used by Kid to get out unnoticed by the neighbors. So wouldn't it be fitting if it were right below Kaito's window? He thought so.

Now if he could only reach…

He glared at the metal ladder a good four feet above his head. How was he supposed to reach that? He glared at it harder as the rain pelted his face. Maybe if he stared at it long enough it would just fall down. Yeah right. Then an idea hit him. He grinned and began to unbutton his coat. Thank you Agasa-hagase! He thought happily as he threw his coat to his feet and took off his stretch-suspenders. He twirled them around in his hand for a moment as he planned out where he was going to aim. Then released. Come on! Come on! He whispered to himself as it flung through the air.

Just a little farther…

Just a little farther…

Just a little farther…

Yes!!

The suspenders latched around the last of the ladder's steps. Conan gave it a good tug to make sure with was secure then latched the other end onto the chain link fence behind him. Once he made sure that that too was secure he pressed the clasp/ button. It didn't take long after that for them to bring the ladder down to his height. And it took an even shorter amount of time for him to make his way up it.

Conan hoisted himself up onto the landing where the stairs ended and looked around. There were two windows next to the fire escape one of them had to be Kaito's. Though it really didn't matter. After all he didn't even know if Kaito was in his room. He just wanted to get in the house. He just wanted to talk to him. That is, assuming he didn't have him arrested for breaking and entering. But could you honestly charge a seven-year-old kid with that?

He slowly crept forwards towards the first window. Of course the curtains were shut so he couldn't see if anyone was inside. However he could see the lock on the inside of the wooden frame. He tried the window anyways. Yup, it wouldn't budge. So he moved onto the next window. This one had different color drapes. Instead of the dark green of the other window this one was a light blue. Almost transparent and yet not quite. And no matter how hard Conan tried he could only get a rough idea of what lay beyond the window.

There was a desk to the left and a bed on the right. The door was adjacent to the window. That was about all he could tell. He looked down at the window's frame. He didn't see a lock. That was a good sign. He brought his fingers down to the bottom and lifted. It didn't move. He felt his heart drop as he tried again but this time with more force. That window wasn't going anywhere. He groaned and fell backwards so he was sitting on the slippery metal walkway glaring at the window. Rain drenching his clothes. That was when the curtain flapped and he saw something he wished he never would.

Blood lay in a pool under the unmoving feet of a boy on the bed.

Kaito!

It didn't take more than half a second for Conan to get to his feet and have his face plastered against the glass. He wished he hadn't seen it. He wished that it were just the rain on his glasses that warped his sight. But there was no such luck. He could see the blood clear as day. And he could see Kaito's unmoving body on the bed just as well. His heart picked up pace as he stared at the translucent blue curtains. He had to get inside! Now! But how…well there was always one way.

Break the window.

He crouched down and with trembling fingers and turned the dial on his sneakers. Once the familiar hum came to his ears he backed up as far as he could…and then ran straight at the glass. As the window shattered around him he tried his best to keep from getting cut. However despite all his jerking movements he still managed to get a long slash along the side of his leg from a piece that had remained in the window frame. Ignoring the pain that surged up his leg he made his way to Kaito's bedside.

He looked up at the seemingly sleeping figure of his friend. He had a sad expression written across his face and tear lines running down the sides of his cheeks. His body was laid out on the bed with his feet dangling off the edge and his arms on either side of his thighs. One hand held a metal playing card. The edge of which was smeared in a thin line of the same red liquid that now coated the floor. The other hand was palm down on the bed. Blood stained the skin around his fingers and the white cotton sheets they rested on. With shaky hands Conan turned the hand over.

Immediately he was sickened at the sight of the brutal cut across his wrist.

But he didn't look away. Even as the feeling of utter dread settled in his chest. Instead he eyed the cut flesh. Watching as blood flowed out between the parted skin. He looked up at Kaito. Eyes filling with his own tears as he watched and waited for any sign that he was still breathing. Still _alive_. But there was nothing. The tears that had brimmed up along the corners of his eyes now fell along his face as he climbed up beside him. He brought his hand forward and placed it on his neck. There was no pulse.

He felt the sudden urge to deny it. Deny that any of this could possible happen. That he was still at Ran's apartment fast asleep and he was just having a nightmare about the phantom that always presented himself in his mind. Hoping, no, begging it wasn't true.

He was then rather violently stirred from his thoughts as a loud ring echoed in his ears.

He reached down into his pocket and brought forth a glistening red cell phone. As of right now he would forever hate that color. He looked down at the screen through bleary eyes.

"Ran!" he cried as he flipped the phone open and held it to his ear.

"Conan-kun? Where are you? What's wrong?" Ran asked from the other end of the line desperately.

"Ran you got to get here fast!" Conan sobbed into the receiver. "Kaito's dying!"

"What!? Conan what are you saying?"

"I mean his wrist is cut and there is blood everywhere!" he screeched.

He had no idea what to do. Well he probably did but his mind was so fried with questions and panic that he couldn't think clearly. The only things that seemed to be registering in his mind were the gash on Kaito's wrist and pool of scarlet blood on the floor.

"C-Conan-kun I need you to settle down. Tell me, where are you?" Ran said as calm as she could with out her voice cracking. Conan thought hard for a moment before he remembered the address out front. He relayed this information to her as quickly as he could. "Good now Conan I need you to do exactly what I say. Is there anything around you to tie his arm up with?"

Conan mentally hit himself. Why the hell hadn't he done that when he first realized the situation? He looked around frantically. There was nothing. He could try to rip the sheets but they looked like they were made out of very durable material. He probably couldn't rip them even if he tried. Then he looked down.

"My shoelaces!"

"Ok I need you take off your shoelaces and tie them as tight as you possibly can around Kaito's bleeding arm. I'm coming now with Nakamori-san."

She didn't need to say anything from that point on for he had already tore the laces from his shoes and was now wrapping them around Kaito's arm. Then the last of Ran's words hit him like a bullet.

"Ran d-did you say Nakamori-san?"

"…"

"Ran?" he echoed. It was no use. She had already hung up.

"Damn it!" Conan swore as he shoved the phone in his pocket. He didn't have time to worry about the man who was always after Kid.

It wouldn't matter if he came or not if Kid was dead.

I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I+I

Everything hurt.

Not only just his body but his mind too. His head was spinning with so many thoughts but none made any sense to him. They came and went in flashes. Over and over and over again. He tried to lift his hand to his throbbing head but he couldn't. He tried moving his arm at all. It wouldn't budge. He tried to lift his leg, move his toes, anything. Nothing was happening. So he laid still. He could breath but that was even difficult. His entire body felt like lead bricks. When he cut himself he wasn't planning on not being able to breath. If he had wanted that he would have drowned himself in the tub. Suffocating just didn't sound like a pleasant way to die. He groaned under the weight on his chest.

And to his surprise...it lifted.

He felt warm sensations light up on his cold neck. He didn't understand them. They were centering themselves around the vein there. Warming his skin then leaving then returning. He tried to speak out but ended up just gasping and choking on air. A trail of tickles down his throat set him into fit of agonizing gasps. He tried to choke it down but ended doubling over on himself. The pain of actually moving his body hurt far worse than he thought it would. He clutched he chest and tried to regain his breath. Damn this hurt a lot more than he thought it would.

Once his breathing returned to normal he felt the warm sensations run up and down his arms. This was beginning to scare him. Not being able to tell what they were nor being able to stop them. Not that he really wanted to. The heat felt good on his icy skin. He tried to relax as the warmth rubbed soothing circles on his skin. Maybe it wasn't so bad after all. He took a long slow breath. It was easier this time. He took another breath. Much easier.

That was when he noticed the garbled noises coming to his ears. He tried to decipher them but they only came out as mush. The sensations were running along the back of his neck now. Then running up the back of his head. Then back down. It was making him sleepy but he was far to worried about them to nod off.

He tried to move out his hand to reach them but when he did they immediately left his skin. He frowned best he could and let his hand fall. Hoping the heat would return. But it didn't. Instead he began to feel pressure on his arm. Now that hurt. He winced and tried to retract his hand but it was being held firmly in place by some unknown force. So he tried harder. He pulled back with the most force he could muster until finally he was able to. He cradled his hurt arm and brought his legs up to guard himself.

The gargled noises came back. They sounded so fast. Almost to the point of calling them frantic. He felt the heat run itself along the side of his face. It calmed him but the hurt in his arm kept him from succumbing to it. If he let his guard down he felt the pain would return. He didn't like the pain.

The pain...why was it there again?

He couldn't concentrate. Why did he do that to himself? Why did he do such a foolish thing? Why when so many people loved him?

He froze. He wasn't thinking that was he? No, he didn't feel remorse for what he did. Then why had he thought that? The sensations had found their way to the back of his neck again. But he could feel...what was it? The heat trembling?

He couldn't take it any longer. He didn't care if his body didn't want to. He didn't care that his body told him to lie still and sleep. He wanted to know.

He slowly widened his eyes. Trying so hard to keep them open despite their desire to drop back down. He tried to look around with his squinted eyes but all he could see was a blur of colors and shapes. He blinked slowly and opened his eyes a little wider. The shapes weren't becoming any clearer but he could see more. There was a great amount of light blue around him. That told him he must still be in his room. He looked around more. He could see his black pant legs of his uniform that he held so close to himself. And he could see...someone sitting next to him. The person was so small. He could make out the dark blue on his tiny chest and the light blue below that. The rest of him was cut off by the edge of the bed. Who was that? He thought to himself. The tiny person had one arm reached out but he couldn't see his hand. That explained the heat on the back of his neck. The person must be stroking it. His other hand was resting on the edge of the bed. Curled up into a small fist. Or what looked to be a fist. It was hard to tell.

And for the third time the garbled noise rang in his ears. But this time he got some of what was said. It sounded like...'Polish hair cut' he scrunched up his nose. What the hell? He strained his ears. 'Polish make-up'.

That didn't make any sense either. He looked up at the person beside him. He must be the one saying all these strange things. His vision was getting better. He could make out more details on him. There were a pair of glasses on his face. He could see small yellow dots amidst the dark blue on his chest. Presumably buttons. Hadn't he met this boy before? Yes he was sure of it...he thought long and hard about it. Then the clear image struck him hard in the face.

The boy he had run into with Ran earlier!

His breathing hitched as he stared at the boy. If he was here that must mean Ran was there too! No no no no no! He screamed mentally. Everything just got a whole lot worse very fast.

He clenched his eyes shut and tried to hold himself in closer the ball he was already in. The boys' hands left the back of his neck and he felt the bed dip as he crawled on. The boy tried to pull lightly on Kaito's legs but he just held them closer. The boy tried to pull on his uninjured arm. He ripped it from his grasp and did the same he had done with his leg. He wanted it all to go away. And that was what was supposed to happen when he cut his wrist. Then why had these people shown up? Why was he still there? Why hadn't he died?

He felt himself sink lower and lower into is pit of despair. Now what would happen to him? He didn't want to think about it. He didn't want to think about anything. It was getting harder to anyways. His arm had gone back to throbbing like mad. He wanted to bring it out to inspect it but doing so would require him unraveling himself from his tight ball. He didn't want to give the boy the chance to grab it again. He wasn't strong enough to fend him off at the moment.

Also it was getting hard to think with what the boy was doing. He was running his fingers through his hair slowly.

_'Stop it!' _he plead in his mind. But his hand continued. Kaito tried to remain in his tight ball but with the boy's relaxing movements he could feel his body loosening and his breaths coming slower and deeper.

_'Stop it!' _he begged again. He tried to get his thoughts past his lips but they were all caught in his throat. He tried to move his head to get his hands off it but his body stood still. He would be lying if he said he didn't like what he was doing but he didn't like the idea that the boy was the one doing it. Especially a boy that resembled Shinichi. Oh yes he remembered that part. In fact that was one of his first thoughts when he recognized him. He just tried to push it to the back of his mind.

"Please calm down Kuroba-kun," the boy cooed in his ear. Kaito stiffened. That sounded way more affectionate that it should for a seven-year-old boy to a seven_teen_-year-old teenager. He began to pry his eyes open again. He could see now except for the corners of his eyes that still held their blurriness. He darted his eyes to his side and saw the boy's shoe. He tried to look farther up but he could only see up to about midway on his blue vest. He did notice a long cut running across his leg though. He wondered briefly how he got it. But then said boy got lower. He could see now clearly his face. It looked sad and worn. A pang of guilt hit his chest as he looked at him. He couldn't help it. Boy or not those eyes belonged to Kudo Shinichi.

The boy turned his head so he was looking at Kaito's face. Instantly his watery blue eyes turned wide with shock as he noticed Kaito's staring back at him.

"Kuroba-kun?" he asked as if not sure if it was him. Then his eyes suddenly flashed. Kaito gulped slightly. He looked like he was debating on hitting him across the face or lunging himself at him.

He was relieved when he chose the later of the two.

He flung his small arms around his neck nearly choking him in the process. "You moron!" he yelled as he pulled himself away. Kaito stared up at him blankly as he began to uncurl himself. There was something he was missing here. Something of vital importance. He tried to ask who the boy who he was but all that came out of his throat was 'hoo a ou' he began to sit up but the boy pushed him back down. "No lay still!" he shouted with a stern tone. Kaito was a bit taken back by this. Who was he to tell him what he should do? But he let curiosity get the better of him.

He wanted to know what the boy would do.

So he obediently lay back down. Never taking his eyes off him. The boy nodded in approval before turning away. Kaito took a deep breath and closed his eyes. New questions were beginning to pound at his mind. Why was this kid acting like this? Why was he even there to begin with? Where was Ran? Why hadn't already been hauled off to some sort of mental hospital? Why was-

GAAH!!

His eyes shot open as he glared down at the boy who was now examining his arm. He tried to pull away but he had a death grip on it. Another wave of pain shot up his injured arm. He hissed at the boy but didn't try to pull away again. It was too painful. The boy shook his head angrily and went back to his examination. That was when Kaito noticed the shoelace tied around his arm. No wonder his arm hurt, it was tied tight enough to rip his arm in two. Maybe he was exaggerating but that was what it felt like. It wouldn't be so bad if it were just loosened a little bit. He lifted his hand to it but it was immediately slapped away and pinned next to his head. Surprised he looked up but instantly wished he didn't. The boy was glaring at him with such hate intensified eyes he thought they would catch his skin on fire.

"Don't you fucking dare!" he screamed at him. Kaito's eyes narrowed and he ground his teeth together.

"And who are you to tell me what I can and can't do!?" he spat hoarsely. He still couldn't do much more that that. In fact that took about all the energy he had. He continued he glare best he could though as he awaited the others reply. Instead of answering verbally the boy instead answered through his eyes. Tears flowed freely out of the corners of them and his grip around Kaito's wrist tightened.

"Just shut up and save your strength you stupid thief." That stopped Kaito. N-no he didn't hear that right did he?

"What are you talking abo-"

"I said shut up!" he hollered. Kaito closed his mouth and the boy took his hand away from his wrist. "Did you really think I wouldn't figure it out eventually? Have a little more faith in your rivals will ya?"

"I can't be." he stated under his breath and shook his head vigorously. It couldn't be. It absolutely couldn't be! Not him! The boy nodded and took off his glasses.

"It's me, Shinichi."

* * *

Oh man!! I just went to go see Batman: Dark Knight!! That was the greatest movie of all time!! Al honesty I don't really care for the Batman series. Yes it's good but it just never really interested me. But today my dad took me and I was all: I hope it's not all boring with a plot I've seen a hundred times. But man! It was the best movie I've ever seen! (Also one of the longest. It was 2 1/2 hours long. Though it really didn't seem like it) I loved the Joker!! Now understand: I have a phobia of clowns like you wouldn't believe. And seeing this movie didn't help with that one bit. The Joker scared the living hell out of me but I will say this. He had one of the best acts I've ever witnessed. Damn that Heath Ledger is talented. The way he looked. The way he acted. Just his demeanor. All of it was flawless. I think that's what freaked me out. It was all so freaking realistic!! But I plan on going to see it again in about a week with my mom when she gets back from her trip. (Now you gotta admit a movie has to be good if you're willing to watch it again despite the fact it's so long. Or despite a fear of clowns.)

hehe...shivers

Ending Song Time!!

_"The words that would mend,_

_The things that were broken,_

_Now it's far too late she's gone away,_

_Every night she would cry herself to sleep,_

_Thinking why does this happen to me?, _

_Why does every moment have to be so hard?"_

**Song**: Wont Go Home Without You **by:** Maroon 5

**Side Note:** Does anyone else find it ironic that Heath Ledger committed suicide?

**Side Side Note:** "Polish hair cut + Polish make-up" "Please Wake up" (Just in case you didn't get that)

Well later!! (Sorry the ending Author's Note was so long) Please for the love of god REVIEW!! Or I swear I'll send the wrath of the Joker upon you!! You've been warned...


	6. Certainty

_**Certainty**_

_**Story Quote:**_ "What does it matter you psychopath?!" (It's my 2nd favorite line in the story. The other one had too much dialog before it)

_**Author's Note:** _All honesty I have no idea why this took me so long to get out. I finished it (thanks to the help of nataeiy1) about two weeks ago and I didn't do any editing after that. That is also why I didn't do the _Started _like I usually do. (I don't remember) Also I changed the title of the last chapter to _Doubt_ (Because sunlight just didn't work. I'll use it sometime later.) So I'm really sorry for the delay and I hope you enjoy the chapter.

ONTO THE STORY!!

* * *

"It's me, Shinichi," the boy said, his voice barely a whisper.

"No you're not! You can't be," Kaito retorted defiantly. This child could not be him. No matter how much he wanted him to be. It just wasn't possible. Or was it? Was there anything to prove he wasn't Kudo? Well, despite the fact that people don't just go around turning into children.

"Yes I am!" the boy who claimed to be Shinichi shouted at him.

"Prove it," Kaito shot back sharply.

The boy opened his mouth to say something but seemed to decided against it. He looked down at his knees and remained silent. Kaito 'hmm'ed at him expectantly, but when the boy did not reply, he just sighed and stared vacantly at the ceiling. He didn't feel like he could do much else. He had already used up what remained of his energy yelling at him. He didn't really mean to be cruel to the boy, but he wasn't in the best of moods; who would be after trying to commit suicide?

"I am Shinichi… but I don't know how I can convince you," the boy murmured under his breath.

Kaito shook his head. "There is only one way that I would believe you were Shinichi. Tell me, the day you attended my heist and stole my switch, what happened right after Nakamori-keibu agreed to my terms of trade?"

"Huh? Well, right after that you put the jewel in my pocket and I put the switch in your hand but I don't see how-"

"That's not what I'm talking about," Kaito said dully. "Something happened between the time after he agreed to the trade and when the actual trade was put into action. Something only Shinichi and myself could have possibly noticed." He looked up and saw the boy give him a puzzled look.

"Wha-?" he began, stopping short as he stared at Kaito. His eyes went wide and he turned away.

Kaito gave him his own confused glance.

"W-well…" the boy stammered as he twiddled his fingers anxiously.

"Well, what?"

"Well… you sort of were relieved, I guess, and, well, you-you sighed against my neck and I guess Ikindofsortofblushedbecauseitfeltreally…" he trailed off and fiddled with his fingers faster, head still hung low.

Kaito wasn't sure if he got what he said correctly; the mass clutter of words went by so fast that they all ran together.

"Really, what?"

"Really…" the boy hesitated with a defeated, troubled sigh before muttering something quietly with his face hidden behind his bangs.

"Speak up!" Kaito voiced as heatedly and as loud as was possible for him at the moment.

The boy's head shot up quickly, revealing an extremely flushed face, doing his best to spit out the embarrassing words. "It felt really, _really_ good!"

All irritation fled Kaito, surprise taking its place as his brain processed the message that was just cast at him.

As if just realizing what he said, the small Shinichi's expression took on a look of panic before it was hidden once again behind his loose hair as he searched for something to divert the subject.

Then as if on cue, Ran and Aoko broke open the door and rushed in. Kaito thoroughly went into shock, nerves too fried to think about what he was actually saying. Mind buzzing with far too many thoughts.

"Why did you do that!?" he asked as he gawked at the splints of wood on the floor. Ran had struck the doorknob with her foot thus breaking it and part of the door. "The door was never locked!" He glared at Ran as he sat up. Only then realizing the other girl's presence in the room. "Aoko?" Oh shit, oh _shit_! Thought Kaito franticly. Why of all people was she there? Anyone else would have been better. Even his mother! Aoko took a step forward but stopped as she looked down and saw the pool of blood at her feet. She made an odd gasping noise before she looked back up at him, water welling up in her eyes.

_Oh no…_

Without time for a second glance, Aoko leapt forwards and pinned Kaito down on the bed by his shoulders.

"You _IDIOT_!! How could do you something like this?! _Why_ would you?! _WHY?!_ Did you just decide to give up?! Weren't you going to find Kudo Shinichi?! You've been working so hard to find him, pushing yourself to your limits! And now, even after all that… you just give up? You're just giving up on _everything_?"

"I thought he was dead…"

"Eh?"

"He just disappeared into thin air and I thought…"

"But he's not?" Aoko asked, her grip loosening, though it was more of a statement than a question.

Kaito turned his head to the side slowly to gaze softly at Kudo who was still looking away out of embarrassment. "Seems like it."

Her grip strengthened once again, causing Kaito to wince. He kept his eyes diverted, unwilling to meet hers, as salty tears dropped onto his face. "But even -hic- even so -hic- that doesn't mean… that doesn't mean you should just… -hic- just… -hic- you can't… -hic-"

"Because I know him," he whispered softly. "And I didn't think I could… I didn't _want_ to…"

"Didn't want to _live_?! Really?! Didn't you think about the people who love you?! I don't know _what_ happened to Kudo-kun, but I'm sure that whether the feeling is mutual or not, he wouldn't want you to disappear! I didn't think you were that _dense_!"

Kaito sat quietly. He didn't know what to say to that. As of right now he felt the same way. Well maybe a little dubbed down but the same nonetheless.

"Hey we should do something about the mess in here." The miniature Kudo suggested. He must have been able to sense the tension and he didn't like it any more than Kaito did. Though Kaito got the feeling he was going to get the same lecture by him as well.

Aoko glared at Kaito again before finally giving in. "Fine but it's only because the kid is here."

Thank you, Shinichi!

"Good." Ran said finally. "Then we should get a bucket of water, some rags, and some soap."

"Right C'mon Conan." Aoko said taking the boy's hand and leading him through the doorway.

Conan huh?

Ran assisted Kaito into a more comfortable position on the bed. With his head now on his pillow he felt much more relaxed. Aoko and Conan had left moments earlier to get washrags and a pail of water. They had to get the blood up off the ground now didn't they? The sheets however, would probably need to be burned. However, he was slightly worried about them not finding them fast enough. He didn't like being alone with Ran. She had far too many mood swings. So did Aoko but he had known her long enough to know the warning signs of them. With Ran he didn't.

That was what worried him.

For the time being she had reverted back to being quiet. Just observing what happened, a trait she had with no doubt learned from the miniature detective. As of right now she was kneeling down beside Kaito doing various tests such as checking his pulse and others that Kaito had long since deemed pointless. He was fine right now. Just very, very thirsty. In fact all he wanted was a glass of water but when he had tried to go get one Ran had insisted that he remain laying down. Once she tried to get him to agree to go to the hospital but he had fiercely denied he needed that much help. She had tried to coax him into it but he had convinced her that Conan got to him before he lost enough blood to matter.

The blood pool on the floor told other wise but she let the subject drop anyways.

He looked at her with a ticked yet sleepy glance. Ran just brushed this off and lifted his cut arm up off his chest. Kaito shut his eyes and groaned. Not out of pain but out of annoyance.

"Now what?" he asked crossly as Ran turned his palm face-up.

"It needs to be cleaned before it gets infected. Do you have a first-aid kit?"

Kaito lifted his other hand and put it over his eyes. Of course he did but it was in the secret room. He hardly ever had another reason besides after he got done being Kid to put it to use so it made sense to just move the kit there. There should be another one though…

"Not that I know of," he replied.

"Is that so?" Ran asked coolly as she traced the cut with her fingers. Motions in which were making Kaito very nervous.

"Ran-san could you please stop tha-ACK!!" he bolted upright as Ran put a great deal of pressure across the center of the cut with her thumb. He tried to pull away but her hand was securely fastened around his wrist. He looked up at her with a horror stricken expression but she didn't release him.

"Wh-what are you doing!? That hurts!" he squeaked.

Ran had a determined look in her eyes as she began to speak. "Not as much as a broken heart."

"Wanna bet!?"

Ran scowled at him and put even more pressure across the cut. Kaito howled out in pain as he clenched his eyes shut.

"Who are you to Shinichi?" she demanded grabbing his other wrist as he tried to pry himself from her.

"I told you! I'm a friend of his! Please let go of me!" he shrieked at her. She applied more force and in return got another howl of pain.

Where the hell were Aoko and Conan? They had to be on the other side of the house not to hear this.

"_How_ are you his friend?"

"I met him a while ago! Let me the hell go!"

"_How_ did you meet him!?"

Kaito looked at her through pain filled eyes. He wasn't sure what to do. If he told her the truth then he would be revealed as Kid. But if he lied and she found out she would hurt him again.

"I met him a while ago in an ice-cream parlor! Holy fucking god that hurts!" he wailed.

"You're lying!" she screamed at him as she dug her nail into the wound. Kaito cried out as tears spilled from the corners of his eyes.

"What does it matter you psychopath?!"

"Because I love him!"

"And what the hell does that have to do with me?!"

"Because he loves _you_!"

Kaito looked up at her through his blurry eyes. He could see her own tears now running down her face.

"I could see it… Every time I looked at him, I could see it… He was always daydreaming--during class, after class, not even realizing that it was time to go to lunch or go home… Spacing out whenever we were just walking together… And more than once he would say something to himself, and I could never hear what he was saying, but every time I was able to catch one word--I always heard 'Kaito'. When I asked him what was wrong he just said he wasn't sleeping well, but I'm not stupid. He looked lovesick and dejected. I was always able to tell with him! And that's why I was able to tell that he's _not_ in love with me--that he's in love with someone else--that he's in love with _you_! I tried to get him to think of something else--to get his mind off of it, but nothing worked. And then he disappeared and I was worried, of course, but he's okay 'cause he calls every once in a while… I-I thought maybe I was just imagining it. That maybe he actually did love me. Then you came to our school and shattered all hopes of that. If you didn't love him why else would you go so far as to look for him? Then I thought, 'It could just be one sided right?' But then you… _you_… did _this_…"

Her hold on his wrist constricted again, getting another cry out of him.

"S-Shinichi even talks about the Kaito Kid sometimes when he calls me. You have no idea what that did to me. Sometimes that was even all he talked about. Once I asked him why he talked about you so much but all he would ever say was 'just someone who's been on my mind lately.' Yeah like I believed that. You were always on his mind."

Kaito couldn't help but feel a swell of pride as he heard this though was careful about showing it. He fumbled for words as Ran's face contorted in pained fury

"But I'm not the-"

"Like hell you aren't!" she was about to lash at his wrist again but he cut her off before she did.

"Stop it!" he pleaded. Ran eyed him warily; her thumb hovering just barely over the cut.

"L-look it's just-"

"Kaito!? Ran!?" called a voice from down the stairs. Ran immediately retracted her hand and bent down to fumble with something under the bed. Kaito now free of her death grip cradled his newly bleeding wrist. It wasn't anything to worry about it just hurt like hell. The shoelace, which was still exceedingly tight around is arm made sure of that. Moments later Ran returned from her quest under the bed with a small white box.

"What's that?" he took a closer look and groaned. "You've got to be kidding me." He mumbled as Ran set the first-aid kit next to him.

"Stick out your arm." She ordered as she applied a few drops of transparent liquid onto a Q-tip.

Kaito gave her a look of sheer horror. "No fucking way."

"Give. Me. Your. Arm." She demanded sticking out her own hand.

Kaito was about to tell her to find some other torture toy to play with but as he opened his mouth to speak Aoko and Conan came bounding into the room. Conan was holding the water bucket with trembling arms while Aoko had the rags. Aoko was panting heavily as she stared at Kaito.

"What's wrong? I heard screaming." she huffed.

Ran gave her a pleasant smile as she held up the Q-tip. "I guess the antibiotic stung."

Kaito looked at Ran dumbfounded. Not only had she lied but also it sounded so _true_ and natural. That smile of hers would have even fooled him if not had been for the pain that was still radiating up his arm. Aoko shot him a look that sent a chill down his spine.

"Quit being such a baby. The cut will get infected if you don't get the antibiotic on it." She scolded before turning around to the heaving Conan. He dropped the pail and collapsed backwards.

"Conan-kun, I'm sorry. Are you okay?" Aoko cooed.

"Y-yeah," he responded nervously, peeling himself up slightly.

"Ok well we should get started." She lifted up the pail of water but just as she was about to spill it over the floor, the phone rang. Everyone turned his or her head to look out the door.

"There are only two people who would be calling that aren't here. #1: It's the school to yell to you about ditching class or 2…it's your mom."

Kaito turned deathly pale.

"I'm going to go get it." Aoko announced as she started out of the room.

"Wait!" Kaito yelled. She turned and looked at him expectantly. "Are you going to-"

"I'm thinking about it." She said coolly as she left the room. Ran gave him a worried look before following.

Once gone Conan turned and faced Kaito. All signs of embarrassment gone from his face.

"So, what did you do?"

"Huh?"

"Don't try to deny it. You must have done _something_ to get Ran angry like that."

"Wha-"

"She was good at hiding it, but I didn't miss the fact that there was blood under her nails and none on the Q-tip. Thus you didn't scream because of the antibiotic. So unless I'm wrong she did something right? Well she would only do that if they did something to her first. Which leads me back to my first question. What did you do?"

Kaito sighed wearily and laid his head back on the pillow.

"Lets' just say she needs therapy and leave it at that."

* * *

And that is all for now. Usually i would put the ending song here but I don't feel like doing it right now. Mostly it's just 'cause i can't think of a good one to put here. So actually if you'd like review and suggest a song you would like here. Though I may be picky. If it's a song i dont like i wont put it here. (There is a list of artist I can't stand on my profile.) However if it is a song i don't know then I will listen to it before I decide. No rap! It'd help me out a bunch so please review!

**Side Note:** As of right now I am also taking story requests. (Bored and need something else to work on.)


	7. Revelation

**Revelation**

**Started:** 8/23/08 11:23:56 PM

**Story Quote:** "I knew it," Kaito sang happily. "You like me."

**Author's Note:** I don't know why really but I have a really bad issue with suffixes. So I'm asking all who read this please tell me if you come across any that I did wrong. Oh yeah! I don't really like using 'Kaasan' for mother so I'm just gonna stick with the English version on that one. Just thought I'd let you know.

P.S. I'm still ticked I only got one more review for New Years Day and I wouldn't have updated this if it wasn't for this strange energy high I got from listening to a couple of really good songs. I just got such in one of my 'must do something' moods that I decided, Screw it! I'll post! But I'm serious for the next chapter. I _**REFUSE**_ to post another chapter until I get the other _**two**_ reviews. _**AND I MEAN IT!!!**_

ONTO THE STORY!!!

* * *

It had been about a half hour now since Kaito feel asleep. Everyone was busily going around the house doing various tasks that ranged from cleaning Kaito's room to imitating Kaito's mothers voice just so they could get screamed at by the school. Yes the school had called but it wasn't until twenty minutes after the first call. But no one was talking about that. Probably because they didn't want Kaito to wake up and find them talking about it. Aoko was the quietest out of them all. Several times Ran would try to start a conversation with her but she seemed so lost in thought that she quickly gave up.

Then Conan decided to be bold and ask directly, "Aoko-neechan, what did you say to Kaito's mom?"

The girl sprung up from her seat in the kitchen. She was obviously so lost in thought she didn't notice Conan in the room. Once recovered she took a deep breath and smiled at him.

"Nothing important, don't worry about it."

"But it's important to me. I found him. I want to know what will happen next."

Aoko sighed and bent down she was eye level with him. "Listen Conan, I want to tell you how great it is that you got to him in time. I want to tell you how grateful I am to you. If you weren't here Kaito wouldn't be either. But this is something you should just let be for us to handle."

"You're not gonna shake me off with that." He said sternly. Maybe a bit too much so, but hell he was worried and she wasn't helping him out any.

"I'll tell you later ok? I-I'm just not in the mood to talk."

Conan lowered his voice as narrowed his gaze at Aoko. "You didn't tell her did you?"

Aoko choked back on her words and buried her face in her hands. A sudden emotion brushed over him at that moment. Which emotion though he wasn't sure. Was it anger because he knew that telling Kaito's mother was the right thing to do? Was it relief because now Kaito didn't have to face his own mother and admit he tried to commit suicide? Or perhaps it was fear knowing that he now had to worry not only for the mental stability of his friend but also for his well-being? What if something like this happened again? Who was to say just because he did it once that he wouldn't attempt to try another time?

Well that was just something that they would have to worry about later. For now they just needed to focus on getting him healthy. A task in which seemed far more difficult than it was originally made out to be.

**BAM!!!**

The room went dead silent for a moment before something else filled the void. "_OW!!!"_ roared Kaito. It took less than an instant for both Conan and Aoko to be out the door. Just outside the door to the kitchen at the foot of the stairs they saw Kaito with both of his hands on his lower back.

"Kaito, what are you doing up!? You're supposed to be resting!" scolded Aoko as Ran joined them from behind.

"I was thirsty!" the teen snapped back as he attempted to stand only to fall back onto the step.

"Then you should have told one of us! We would have gotten it for you. You need to go back upstairs," Aoko warned him.

Kaito's face went vivid red. "I'm not a damn cripple, Aoko! I can get my own water!"

She bit her lip in what Conan thought was an attempt at keeping her own temper in check. "Kaito, please, you need to rest."

He looked like he was about to retaliate when Conan interrupted, "Kaito-niichan, you really need to go back to bed. It would be bad if you were too tired to go to school tomorrow. Someone might get suspicious seeing as you skipped out on today's lesson." He was referring to Hakuba who would for sure be looking into the matter. Kaito looked at him with a pleading expression but Conan kept his ground and before long the thief unwillingly surrendered.

"Fine. I can see it's no use arguing anyways," he said solemnly.

"Thank you, Kaito. I'll go get you some water," Aoko sighed in relief.

The teen just mumbled a response and began the accent on the stairs. "Oh, let me help you!" Ran said hurriedly as she swept past Conan to stand beside Kaito. He looked at her with an expression of pure dread. She raised her hands so that they were on either side of her face as a sign of peace. He continued up the stairs, nonetheless, in a more hurried pace; trying to put space between the two of them. She sighed but did not attempt to follow. She apparently felt guilty about whatever it was she had done to him earlier. Kaito still hadn't told Conan what she was doing or why so he just figured that it something that he'd just have to ask later. Still curiosity gnawed at him relentlessly. However, he was not about to try and upset Kaito just to satisfy his own needs.

"Hey, Aoko?" Kaito called from the top of the stairs as his friend came out from the kitchen holding a glass of clear liquid.

"What is it?" she asked worriedly.

"Who called?"

Aoko's hand shook with a quiet tremor as she tried to keep a smile on her face. "Just school, don't worry about it." Kaito gave her a precarious look. "Seriously! Now go back to bed!" she said as she began her own accent on the stairs.

"Oh, I see…" he trailed off and turned around so that he could walk back to his room.

Something in his expression told Conan that he knew Aoko was lying. His renowned poker face had not yet made a full recovery. He followed Ran up the stairs to Kaito's room. Aoko seemed to be a bit calmer but the vacant expression on Kaito's face sent a chill down the young detective's spine.

"Aoko, can I speak to you for a minute?" asked Ran shakily. The other girl gave her a confused look but walked out of the room nonetheless. Conan took this opportunity to sneak in beside Kaito. The boy sat beside him on the bed.

"So, how are you feeling?"

Kaito shrugged. "Pretty good, I guess, considering…I still can't believe it."

"I agree. I never thought you of all people would do something like this."

"No, not that. I always knew I was a bit suicidal. What I can't believe is that _you_ actually showed up. I honestly thought you were gone. Heh, guess it just goes to show I was never cut out to be a detective."

"To each his own. We all have our own talents. I'd never be able to imitate your uncanny ability to mimic voices. "

"Ah, but haven't you?' he asked. His stare veered off to look out the door where Aoko and Ran were chatting animatedly. A well-known mocking smile crossed his face. "I heard you talk about me quite often. I think your girlfriend is jealous." If Conan's face hadn't suddenly caught fire he might have noticed Kaito absently stroke his wrist.

"What are you talking about!?"

"Is it true?"

"Of course not!" Conan shouted. Both Aoko and Ran looked at him warily before turning away. Kaito feigned a hurt expression though Conan knew there was some truth behind it. The boy sighed and closed his eyes. "I _might_ have brought you up a _couple_ times." There was no concealing the utter delight that lit through his features. "Don't get a big head," Conan muttered lowly.

"I knew it," Kaito sang happily. "You like me."

"No you didn't."

"Did too."

"Shut up."

"See you're blushing!"

"Shut up!"

Kaito was about to patronize him again when Aoko cut him off, "Kaito-kun?"

The thief turned to look at her. "What is it?"

"Did you notice what time it is?" He looked at the window only to see the shady outlines of the world outside. It must have been at least one in the morning.

"Wow. Sure is late," he murmured.

"Uh-huh," Aoko agreed. Kaito gave her a confused glance. He must be wondering what she was going to do now. At least, that's what Conan was wondering. There was no way Nakamori-keibu was all right with this. Best friend or not Kaito was still a boy and Aoko was still a girl. In fact it was a miracle that he wasn't already storming the front door. Based off her passive expression this thought had already occurred to her.

Ran came from behind her and smiled unsteadily. "I hope you don't mind us staying over. We already told our parents that we were staying the night at each others houses."

That explained it.

A slight smile came over his face as his eyes flitted from Conan back to the two girls. "Of course, I don't mind. Thank you very much."

Conan sighed heavily.

* * *

The next day Kaito woke up in a very bitter mood. The night before hadn't gone according to plan. While the one he loved actually slept in the same house with him he had been so tired he couldn't stay up long enough to be with him. He groaned and sat upright in his bed. He could see both Ran and Aoko fast asleep on the floor beside him. He looked around but to his surprise he didn't see Conan. As a reflex he immediately reached down to his wrist to stroke the bandage. The cut was there. So yesterday was real. Then… where was he?

He stood up quietly but as he did so he heard a gruff mumble. He turned around and smiled. The boy was there, fast asleep aside his pillow. Kaito smiled at the young detective. Maybe the night hadn't been so awful after all.

_**BRRIIIIIIINNNG!!!!!**_

He went stiff for a moment before carefully turning around to look for the source of the noise. On the floor, teetering restlessly, was a bright red alarm clock. The tiny black hands were directed at the 12 and 6. Was it really time for school? Aoko pried her eyes open tiredly, then seeing Kaito standing there rose up into a hunched sitting position. He smiled lightly and stood in front of her. "Morning sleeping beauty," he teased.

She glowered at him groggily but couldn't manage to maintain it when he kept smiling like that. "How are you feeling?"

He shrugged nonchalantly. "I think I may have to stay home. Calculus may be too much." He smiled but it soon faded when he saw the pure worry in her eyes. "I'm fine, Aoko," he said reassuringly.

"Are you sure? If you're still feeling ill then we can sta-"

"I'm _fine_, Aoko." He said again with more of an edge. He knew exactly what she meant when she said 'ill'. She looked at him with concern written all over her face but he just smiled and waved his hand in an untroubled way. "Besides, like Conan said last night, _'It would be bad if I were too tired to go to school today. Someone might get suspicious seeing as I skipped out on yesterday's lesson_.'"

"But if you-"

"Aoko!" he said exasperatedly. "I'm _**fine**_. Really. Now C'mon. We need to get to your house so we can get your uniform."

She sighed and nodded her head in defeat.

* * *

School had been by far more unbearable then he thought it would. He found this out as he sat in calculus. Maybe he was too ill for this class. Or perhaps it was this class that was _making_ him ill. If nothing else his partner at his table was. Hakuba was watching him out of the corner of his eye and it made it extremely difficult to remain calm. On more than one occasion he had to stop himself from trying to pull down his sleeve over the cut even though it was already past halfway on his palm. At some point through the lesson he had given up and simply put his hands under the desk.

This was one of the worst mistakes he had made all day.

Hakuba grabbed Kaito's left wrist with his hand and he gave a barely audible squeak. It didn't hurt as must as it did when Ran had done it but it still hurt nevertheless. He shot a look at his captor but the latter was still staring intently at the teacher.

"What?" he asked in a hushed tone.

Hakuba didn't turn his head when he replied, "I could be asking you the same question. What the hell was that yesterday?"

"Buzz off, Hakuba. It's none of your business," spat Kaito as he tried to pull his hand away. Just as it had before it sent a wave of fiery pain through his arm. He winced, a fact that did not go unnoticed by the detective.

"What happened to your arm?" he inquired, barely releasing some on the pressure on Kaito's wrist. Still it made it less painful than before.

"_Nothing_, your gorilla hands are just crushing a few bones," he retorted bitterly. Why did everyone have to be so observant all of a sudden?

This time he did glimpse at Kaito. Kaito glared at him as he awaited a reply but instead the detective remained soundless as stone. Had he given up for the time being? If so why hadn't he let go yet? Then as if to answer to his silent questions Hakuba used his fingers to slide down Kaito's sleeve and the gauze bandages. This time he really was as immobile as stone as his finger traced over the cut. Kaito gritted his teeth and, despite the barrage of pain the rioted up his arm, yanked his arm away from the other. He didn't run away this time. He knew he was caught. There was no point in running. Besides, knowing his luck someone would end up following him and dragging him back.

He glanced up at Hakuba who was staring just as intently as he had before. The only difference this time was his eyes were slightly wider.

* * *

**A/N: **So I hope everyone enjoyed the chapter! Now remember I seriously _**WILL NOT**_ update until I get _**two**_ more reviews for New Years Day!

"All this pain smothers me,

Like a bomb that you can't see,

Tell me, tell me what your after,

I just want to get there faster"

**Song:** Siva **By:** The Smashing Pumpkins

**_Review Please!!!_**


	8. Obscurity

**Captive of Midnight's Hold**

**Started On: **11/2/08 11:27:01 PM

**Chapter Eight: **Obscurity (Edited)

**Edited:** 08/17/11 9:39:21 PM

**Story Quote: **Kaitou watched in horror as the boy fell to the side with blood streaking across his face.

**Author's Note: **I know it's kind of odd to edit this chapter while I still have not finished chapter three, but it was necessary for me to skip ahead. Why? Because someone has decided to take up this story! It's an _amazing_ feeling, and I am so very happy that this story will not just die. So, please, thank the very lovely **H**(dot)**Sera** for deciding to pick up the gauntlet! (Apparently FF reads your username as an address.) It's kind of weird thinking that this is the last chapter I have and will write for this story, though. Hm.

* * *

**Onto the Story!**

* * *

Kaito quickly skirted out of the Calculus room at the end of the lesson without bothering to look back at the detective. It wasn't until he was seated in his next class that he realized he'd forgotten his notebook in his rush. He let his forehead his the table and groaned. Thank gods it was the last class of the day. Aoko glanced at him from her seat at his side, before looking back to the message on the board.

"Do you need help on the quiz or something?" she whispered, trying to be as quiet as she could so the teacher wouldn't hear. She had misinterpreted his groan as frustration due to the test.

"No, but some paper would be awesome," he said, smiling at her. Trying to put her at ease. Honestly, trying to smile just made his stomach squirm, and she didn't buy it in the least. He didn't know why he even attempted it. His nerves felt fried, and all he wanted to do was either break down into hysterics or blow up in her face. But he really had no right to be angry at anyone, save himself. And causing a scene would do nothing but raise attention. Best to just keep up the facade.

The girl nodded and silently tore out a few pieces of paper from her own notebook. He mumbled a 'thanks" and quickly scribbled down the answers to the quiz right as the old History teacher passed by.

Luckily, the rest of the class was lecture. He sighed as the teacher collected all the papers, and then dove right into the subject at hand. Kaito tuned him out from that point on. While the teacher rambled, he let his mind wander. As soon as this class was over, he'd have to deal with Hakuba in one way or another. It wouldn't be enough to simply steal the notebook back; the detective would never just let it end there. And as much as he wished he could just let the detective keep the thing and then continue to avoid him, he needed to stop this. It would be wonderful if maybe Hakuba would avoid _him_ after his discovery, but he wasn't really the type to run away from anything.

Because he was an honest _prick_.

He looked down to glare at his desk when he noticed the small folded piece of paper beside his arm. He slid it into his lap and unfolded it, taking care in making it silent, so as not to alert the teacher. The note was written by Aoko.

_Are you feeling okay? Do you need to go home?_

He scowled at the paper before writing his reply. **Quit it, Aoko.**

She took it and made a face. _Quit what?_ she replied.

**Whatever it is you're doing. The pity or sympathy or whatever it is needs to stop. It's driving me nuts!**

_Would you rather I get something from the broom closet to throw at you, instead?_

**Yes, I would, actually. I'd much rather you just be angry.**

_How is this any worse than being angry?_

**I dunno. It just is. **Actually, he knew exactly why. Because it was so much harder to not feel guilty.

_You're not making any sense, Kaito_.

**I don't know how to explain it. **He bit the end of his pencil. How to say it without actually _saying_ it. **I just don't like to see you miserable. I can't stand to see you hurting.**

She gave him a pained look once she read the note.

_How did this turn into _you_ trying to cheer _me _up?_

**Because you need it more than I do. **Eh, it was worth a shot.

_Lair_.

Well, he'd tried.

**Do we need to have another conversation in which I say "I'm fine" a million times?**

She huffed, and shot him another look. He just stared ahead, absently, nodding like he was actually paying attention to the teacher's ranting.

_I'll pass. No matter now many times you say it, I know it's not the truth. You don't just _do_ something like that over a matter that can be resolved so easily_.

Easy. He glared at the note as if trying to catch it on fire with his eyes. **There was nothing **_**easy**_** about it.** And it wasn't really _resolved_, either. But he kept that to himself and slid the note back across the desk. She'd just finished reading when the teacher began to move. With stealth that even impressed _him_, slightly, she swiped it off the desk and stuffed it into her pocket. They should probably burn that note, actually. No paper trail, so to speak. It was all too easy for that paper to fall out of her pocket. Much, much too easy.

"And that sums up the rest of today's lesson, children." _God__,_ did Kaito hate it when he called them that. "Your projects are due next class. And 'I went to a KID heist' is _not_ an excuse! You've had all week to do this."

KID heist? What heist? He sat fully upright. Should he even ask? "What heist?" Aoko, as if reading his mind, asked.

The teacher gestured to Kaito. "I'm surprised Kuroba-kun hasn't told you, seeing as he is _always_ reading the newspaper in my class."

"I'm not today," the thief responded cheekily. The teacher shot him a hard look.

"Yes, KID has sent a notice out to steal the Raven's Talon, a sapphire on traveling display. Honestly, I don't know what those people are thinking when they _know_ KID is about. But it's not my problem. And again, is _not_ an excuse for you to not have your work done! Do your work! Now, be safe, be smart, and don't scuff the floor in your rush to leave. Class is dismissed."

The chairs all squealed in unison as the students filed out of the classroom. Kaito glanced out the door and, sure enough, he saw the detective leaning casually against a row of lockers with his notebook. Dammit. All hopes he had were gone, just like that.

Aoko took immediate notice. "What is Hakuba doing out there?"

"He's gonna give me back the notebook I left in my last class…"

"If that's all then why do you look so worried?"

"Because that's not all."

"What else is there?"

Kaito gave the detective that awaited him another anxious glance before answering. "He noticed," was all he said, not bothering to elaborate any further. Aoko was silent for a moment, in which Katio stood silent. Hopefully she didn't press. He really didn't want to have to explain it. "Don't worry about it. It's just Hakuba," he said.

"So you're going to tell him? The whole thing, I mean?"

Pause. Then, "Yeah, I guess so."

She looked unsure. "Do you want me to wait for you?"

"No, Aoko, it's okay. I'll be back soon." Time to own up, he guessed. When did he ever become such a coward? He was better than this. Funny thing was, he didn't really _feel_ better that this. In fact, he felt more like he should crawl into the black hole in his stomach that was already trying to swallow him alive.

He actually wished it would.

She gave him a tortured look. But Kaito just waved her off until she got the hint and left. Well, might as well get it over with. The thief cursed heavily as he got up from his seat and brusquely trudged out of the room. Hakuba turned to look at him as he did so.

"Can I have my notebook back?" Kaito asked with an irritated tone. Hakuba nodded and held out the book. Warily, Kaito held out his hand to take it. It really shouldn't have surprised him when the detective decided to clutch his forearm. Kaito sighed and looked up. "Is this really necessary? Can't you just give me the book and leave?" he pleaded. Hakuba's expression did not falter. "Fine," he huffed and pulled his arm away. He was very thankful that Hakuba had not decided to grab his left arm again, there's only so much one can take in a short amount of time. "Follow me," he instructed. Hakuba didn't waste any time in doing just that.

Kaito steered through the halls quickly. There was no use running away from the inevitable. Hakuba was relentless; besides, the sooner this was over with the better. The school had completely emptied and it was almost agonizingly quiet as they went on. Neither one seemed to have enough courage to say anything until they had to.

Finally, after the seemingly endless walk, Kaito swerved off into an empty classroom. Once Hakuba made it after him he turned and closed the door. The thief sighed wearily and turned around.

"Let's have it then."

Hakuba nodded and folded his arms. "Where to start? Well, why not at the beginning. When did the depression start?"

Kaito leaned back against a desk. "This isn't going to be like some psychiatric examination is it? If so, don't bother."

"Just answer the question, Kaito."

"I don't know…a while ago, maybe…" That was a lie. He knew exactly how long ago this all started.

"And what caused it?"

"Hey, doc," Kaito rose his hand in as childish of a fashion as he could. The seriousness of the moment was suffocating him. He wanted nothing more than to run away. He also knew he couldn't. Hakuba was watching him with unnerving closeness.

"What?"

"Since you insist upon the therapy approach, does that mean the confidentiality thing still applies?"

Hakuba sighed. "Yes, I won't arrest you or use this discussion in any way if it involves a confession of you being KID."

"It's not just that," he admitted, lowering his head.

"I won't say anything to anyone. Believe me or not, but I actually care if you're alright."

Kaito gave the detective a small smile. "What was the question again?"

"What caused this?"

* * *

Throughout the entire 'therapy' session Hakuba remained very quiet. The only time he would say anything was when he asked a question. The rest of the time Kaito was the only one speaking. It was a very strange thing to talk about everything. Well, not everything. He left out a few details that would be better off not shared. Such as Conan being Shinichi, the fact that he was in love with him…

The other reasons for why he tried to take his own life…

Still, Hakuba didn't say anything. When Kaito finished his story he was expecting to feel relieved but instead he was feeling worse than ever. The reason for that mainly was because the more he thought about the things that led up to yesterday, the more he realized they were still true. The only thing that had really changed was that Shinichi had come back. There were still other reasons. Wasn't he still a danger to those close to him? Wasn't he still causing them misery? Especially now more than ever.

Shinichi disappearing really was just a catalyst for something he should have realized a long time ago.

"And, so, well… I did this." He rolled up his sleeve and slipped down the bandage. When he turned his palm right side up he saw Hakuba cringe. Well, he _had _tried to do a thorough job so he cut both deeply and widely. The gash on his wrist was proof enough of that. Yet it wasn't enough for he was still standing there today without needing a blood transfusion or stitches. "Is your curiosity satisfied now?" he asked as he pulled back the gauze and his sleeve. When he looked back up, however, Hakuba's stare was agonized.

Yet he said nothing.

Kaito bit his lip and looked down at the floor. "Say _something_…" he muttered.

"I—I honestly don't know what to say," he confessed, sweeping a hand along his face. "What are you supposed to say to that?"

Kaito shook his head. "It doesn't really matter, I guess. But at least now…you know. So there's no confusion, no warped theories, or anything like that." He stood up completely and strode forwards. "So now I'm gonna leave." He snatched the notebook from the desk beside Hakuba and turned for the door but the detective plunged his arm out to stop him.

"How can you be so casual? This is a big deal."

"Is it really?"

He scowled. "That's not funny, Kaito."

"Good, I wasn't trying to be."

Hakuba's mouth dropped slightly. "Do you really think that way? That your life is so insignificant that no one would care if you were gone?"

"Of course not, after all, if KID wasn't around I do believe that many devoted fans would be disappointed."

This made Hakuba lurch forward, pinning Kaito, by the front of his uniform, up against the wall. He glowered at him with narrowed eyes. "And what of Aoko? Your mother? Did you think about them?"

Kaito glared back as he spat, "Yes, I did! Do you really think me so heartless that I wouldn't consider those closest to me? I know I'm a selfish ass but I at least think about the others."

"And?"

"You know what my reasoning led to." He saw Hakuba glance down at his wrist then back up. "I don't need to explain myself again. Well, more like I _won't_. It does no good." He looked down at Hakuba's hand, which was fastened to the front of his school coat. "This proves my point." Hakuba's glare grew fiercer and his grip tightened. "Just give it up. It's not worth the effort."

"I'm not going to let you get off so easy, Kaito. You may think you're worthless but we don't."

This time it was Kaito whose fuse was lit. "Then tell me! What am I! If not worthless, then dangerous! Don't you _understand?_"

"You're—"

"Oh, shut it! I don't want to hear it."

"Fine then!" Hakuba yelled and released his hold on Kaito. "Go on thinking that! At this point, I'm not so sure it's worth it to tell you otherwise!" His breath hitched as he as he realized what he had said. Kaito just smiled meekly and nodded. This seemed to confuse the detective even more.

"Thank you," he said quietly as he picked up the notebook off the floor and began to walk away.

Alarmed, Hakuba called after. "Wait! Where do you think you're going?"

"Oh, didn't you hear? Apparently KID's got another heist tonight and I, being one of his most devoted fans, have got to go. See ya, doc." And with a wave he was gone.

Hakuba swore and punched the blackboard.

* * *

"LADIES AND GENTELMEN!" Kaitou announced with a booming voice. The crowd at his feet burst into applause at the sight of their idol atop the museum roof. He smiled and held up the sparkling blue gem to the moonlight. The crowd went ecstatic at the sight of it. The thief ignored the noise and focused entirely on the jewel as it sent a vivid array of color across his white attire. A truly magnificent gem.

Just not the _right _one.

He sighed and lowered the blue stone. "It seems that—" he was cut off when he noticed another presence behind him. He turned to see Nakamori Ginzo with a gun raised to Katiou's head. The crowd booed but the inspector did nothing to show he heard them. "Ah, it seems that you've decided to join me at last, Nakamori-keibu," he announced happily as he took a step closer. The elder man cocked the gun. He apparently was trying very hard not to blink, the thief noted. "That won't work, Nakamori-keibu," he said with a smirk. The man kept silent. Kaitou tilted his head to the side. "It's not very fun trying to guess what you're thinking, you know. I do wish you would clue me in."

Still, the man remained silent.

"Keibu? Are you—"

Another voice: "Stay where you are, KID. Move even an finger and I'll shoot."

Kaitou froze as he felt cold metal against the back of his head. "Ah, a trap. I'm actually somewhat disappointed. You usually have more people."

"That'd just give you a better chance at escaping."

"Oh, you've caught on, have you?" he said with false cheeriness. Damn it, that complicated things. He glanced to his side to try and catch a glimpse of the one behind him. Nope, he was too far back. He turned back when he heard Nakamori's low growl.

"What was that?"

"Shut up, KID," he snapped. His gaze wavered as he tried to communicate telepathically to the one behind him. Whatever fight he was arguing, he was loosing. Maybe now would be good chance to grab a smoke bomb…he slowly began to reach down—

"Put your hands up!" commanded Nakamori as he entirely refocused on him. Kaitou pulled on the best poker face he could and slowly raised his hands on either side of his face. Then he heard the faintest of whispers in his ear.

"Pull your sleeve up before he notices."

Hakuba!

What the hell was he doing? He peeked down at his arm and sure enough the white and red gauze was clearly visible. He looked back up at Nakamori who had not taken his eyes away from his target. He did, however, when he saw Kaitou look at his arm. He got a perplexed look on his face.

"What's tha—" he didn't get the chance to finish as Kaito slid out of range of the firearm and a vibrant blue smoke sifted through the air. The thief heard Nakamori's scream of rage as he took off towards the other side of the building. He slid across the rooftop at an amazing speed and then, just as he was mere centimeters from the edge, he hit the switch on his belt so that two silver cloth wings erupted on either side of him.

The bitter night air stung his skin as he soared through the perpetual darkness.

The crowd below him screamed in delight as he flew past. He smiled slightly down at them before returning his attention to steering straight. The dark, looming shapes of buildings spotted the ground below him. He would need to land on one of them so that he could easily change and merge with the enthusiastic fans. He looked over his shoulder to make sure he was a safe distance away from museum, and then with a short decent landed softly on a broad rooftop. He snapped the glider on his back shut and looked around.

Something was…_wrong._

He squinted in the darkness. Then a metallic click echoed next to his ear. He turned and looked into the beady black eyes of the man he had grown to despise.

Snake.

His jaw dropped as he stared at the evil monster. The burning end of his cigarette ghoulishly illuminated his face. "Hello, KID. Long time no see." He grinned and bared some of his foul teeth at the teen. Instinctively, Kaitou reached into his coat and felt around for his weapon. _His gun! Where was the card gun? _The man's evil grin grew wider as he saw the look of utter dread set on the thief's face. "Aw, d'you loose something? Heh, guess this won't be much of a challenge, then." He raised the sleek, black pistol and simultaneously Kaitou felt pain rocket through his leg. He cried out in agony as he fell to the ground. Tears of pain slid down the side of his face. The man in black gave a deep, hearty laugh as he watched.

"Don't play with him. We need to get out of here quick," hissed a voice behind Snake. Another man in black attire stepped out from the gloom. His long blonde hair whipped in his wake like a devilish flame.

"I know, Gin," grumbled Snake as he raised the pistol. This time aimed at Kaitou's chest. Fear gripped at his chest as he stared down the barrel of the gun. Yet as he thought back he realized, wasn't this what he wanted all along? Maybe not this way but the same result nonetheless. He took a deep, shaky breath and closed his eyes. It would be over soon.

"KAITOU!" screeched a high-pitched voice. The thief recognized it at once.

"NO!" he screamed and jumped to his feet. The pain immediately seared through his leg but he didn't care. He took off running towards the small boy by the entrance to the roof. "Go _back_!"

He sprang forward and pushed the young detective out of the way just in time for a bullet to embed itself into his shoulder. He howled in pain and landed harshly on his outstretched arms. "Kaitou! Kaitou, are you all right?" asked Conan with a trembling voice. He opened his bleary eyes to look at his love.

"Run…" he whispered quietly.

"Ahaha! Well, what do you know! Apparently KID has a soft spot for his little runts, after all," cackled the man known as Gin. "Let's see if we can use that to our advantage, then."

Conan's eyes went wide with fright as the man got closer. "You—!" he was cut off as Gin brought down the butt of his pistol down upon his head. Kaitou watched in horror as the boy fell to the side with blood streaking across his face.

"Why not just kill him?" questioned Snake.

Gin snickered and lit a cigarette. "He's valuable. We can find a use for him, I'm sure. If only for a little longer. We can ditch him later. I'm feeling merciful." He laughed coldly as he turned to look at Kaitou who lay immobile on the rough gravel. "Heh, I think this one's still breathing." He raised the gun once more and placed it to Kaitou's temple. "This will be the notorious magician's final act."

A shot rang out through the bleak night sky.

* * *

**A/N:** *groans* Just no. Half way through I just gave up rewriting and just edited.

* * *

**Ending Song Time!**

_I can hand out a million vaccinations,_

_Or let'em all die in exasperation,_

_Have'em all healed of their lacerations,_

_Have'em all killed by assassination,_

_I can make anybody go to prison,_

_Just because I don't like'em and,_

_I can do anything with no permission,_

_I have it all under my command."_

**Song: **Handlebars **Artist:** Flobots


	9. DISCONTINUATION NOTICE

Hey, guys. Nice to talk to you all again. It's sure been a while, hasn't it? (And by a while I mean about _two years?_) As you all could probably tell by the way this is starting out, this isn't a chapter. Hold it! Before you all start lighting your torches and picking up your axes, I want to tell you something.

Yes, it's as you feared, I'm abandoning this story.

But!

But, I'm not completely giving it up. I won't be writing any more chapters, probably ever, but I want to put it out there, that if _anyone is interested_ in continuing it, they are _extremely welcome_. I had a few ideas for this story, nothing much, but I'd be willing to share them. I'd also be willing to edit any chapters should they want me to (and I probably will, since I'm editing the rest of the story, anyways). I really don't want my first story on here to completely die out, it's quite disappointing. I'm hoping some generous fan out there will find they have nothing better to do than find an awesome way to end this. Hey, I can hope, can't I?

Take my proposition into account, okay?

However, should no one choose to continue this, I really hope you've all enjoyed the tale while it lasted. While I was writing it, I really did have a lot of fun, and I'm sorry that I've lost all aspiration to finish. Check in every now and again, if you like. I am periodically editing and updating the redone chapters. Chapters one and two should give you a pretty good idea as to what to expect from the edits.

I hope to hear from you all soon. Whether it's to take up my story or just tell me what you enjoyed while it lasted.

Please take the poll on my profile?

Happy New Year, everyone!

~Ran


	10. ADOPTION NOTICE

Hey, everyone, some great news! Looks like this story has been officially adopted! I am absolutely over the moon about this development; honestly, I can't even describe. I was very worried this story would never have an ending.

Please show the new author, **CsillaDream**, the utmost gratitude for her graciousness! I'm sure she'll take this story somewhere fantastic, and I hope you will all enjoy the new route she plans on taking. I will not be deleting this story, if that was something you are worried about, as I understand many of you still like the way I had it, but I ask that you give the new story your attention (as I still periodically receive PMs asking me to update, which I have before stated I would not).

The new story can be found here!

www DOT fanfiction DOT net / s / 8491589 / 1 / Captive-Of-Midnights-Hold

This does mean that I actually need to finish editing chapters, though... I have really been putting that off for much too long.


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